I have been practicing LOA for more than 7 years since discovering The Secret. From The Secret book, I practiced all different types of methods, meditations, vision boards, gratitude, journaling you name it, I practiced it.
I was able to manifest loads of things such as European trip for free, job that pays 10k dollars a month with excellent colleagues, build my own house and bought a new car. I am grateful for all of this, and I also list all the things I am grateful for everyday.
However, I am still waiting to manifest my partner. I focused on building my career, studying and perfecting my craft, since I have read that you have to focus on other stuff while waiting for your big desire.
Whenever people tell me to be more patient, I always thought, is 10 years not enough waiting? No one has asked me out on a date for 10 years?
Whenever I hear people telling me to focus on other stuff, I did every single course out there related to my job and even not related to my job, I learned 3 foreign languages, learned yoga, gained and lost weight and lost more weight, ran a marathon, travelled the whole world, learned how to paint, joined an online dating, joined every invitation for brunch, night out, learned how to open chakras, silencing the mind etc! And still, I have no prospect!!!I just don't understand it.
I am a very happy, lovable, and beautiful person inside and out. All the people around me are also wondering the same thing. I love myself, I take good care of myself and I always look at the bright side of things. People even call me Polyanna because of my positivity.
I have a request, does anyone else waited this long for them to manifest the one that they truly wanted? Say a job, a child, for me a boyfriend/husband.
I have never felt frustrated in my life whenever I think about it. I keep on reading every success story here and in every LOAD forum and I am quite jealous of people manifesting a romantic relationship easily, and here I am, still waiting. Some motivation needed, please.
“I am still waiting to manifest my partner.”
“. . . focus on other stuff while waiting . . .”
“. . . not enough waiting?”
“. . . here I am, still waiting.”
“I have never felt frustrated in my life whenever I think about it.”
That doesn’t seem vibrationally accurate when you keep reiterating the focus on “waiting.” Someone who feels relaxed and satisfied with where they are doesn’t wait because they’re enjoying now. The only reason anyone wants anything is because they believe they will feel better in the having of it. So if you feel good, you have what you want. You don’t need to wait for a relationship to feel good, because you already feel good.
Thank you Brian for your reply. I am already expecting that someone would reply about my "waiting" "frustration" etc. As I have said, I would like to know who else feels the same way before and manifested it after a long time. I am sure I am not the only one who feels this way because even though I feel great perhaps, 90% of the time, I don't think that the 10% of not feeling good is the one blocking my manifestation. Of the 10 years, I have felt really good, I've sent out my intention and request to the universe and then focused on improving my life, career, etc. So, what else could be missing? This is what I don't understand.
I know it is easier said than done that you don't need to wait for a relationship to feel good. But I am only a human being that needs someone to share my life with, to share the love and life that I have and to feel intimate with. I cannot be intimate on my own, right? The love, the happiness, the life, yes, I can have that and feel good on my own, or share that with family and friends, but the intimacy part? How will I let go of that without feeling the lack and need?
“What else could be missing?”
The only thing you would be missing is your belief that something has gone wrong.
If you were really feeling good 90% of the time, and maybe you do, but this one topic you may have more resistance on that you’re aware of. And that’s alright. But when you feel good 9 times out of 10, why waste your energy on the one time you’re not feeling good? Why focus on relationships, when you only want one to feel good, which you already do. Don’t focus on relationships if it causes you to stop feeling good. You already feel good, so keep focusing on whatever topics keep you feeling good.
You said you felt great 90% of the time. 90 percent! Someone who feels that great that much of the time wouldn’t care too long about anything not having manifested because you already feel so good in your life. So everything’s good.
“But I am only a human being that needs someone to share my life with . . .”
“Needs” is a word that signifies resistance. When you need it, you’re not a vibrational match to it. You’re not allowing it. Because when people need something they typically get upset if they don’t have it. When you want it, and would like it, but it’s not necessary, you release your resistance and allow yourself to receive it.
“. . . to share the love and life that I have and to feel intimate with. I cannot be intimate on my own, right?”
Yes, you absolutely can! Have you ever heard of a Hitachi? But seriously, the only reason you want to be with someone is so you can feel loved, accepted, appreciated, attractive, fun, adventure, interested, eager and excited. And you can feel all of those emotions now by focusing on what you want, why you want and how you want to feel.
The other person doesn’t create those emotions within you. You do. You create those emotions with the thoughts you think. And yes, it is easier to feel those emotions when you have a pleasing partner to look at, and hug, and kiss, and cuddle with, but what happens when they’re upset and out of alignment? Now you’re mad at them for being mad at you. They did something to hurt your feelings. And now you resent them or try to control them to change so you can feel better.
The good and the ugly parts of a relationships come about when you base your emotions on the other person. When they have nothing to do with why you feel good or don’t feel good. You cause yourself to feel everything by what you give your attention to. When you focus on what you want, you feel good. When you focus on the lack or absence of what you want, you feel bad. And you have complete control of that. As you start utilizing your power of focus, then when you meet the unconditional man who is ready for you, you can confidently tell them., “You are off the hook for how I feel. I don’t hold you responsible for my emotions. So if I feel upset, you don’t need to change a thing. I just need to change my focus, and I will feel better.”
When you feel all the emotions associated with having a relationship then you have what you really want which is the vibrational relationship that exists right now. You have access the the relationship right now. And when you feel it, you have no awareness of it’s absence because you’re too busy, too distracted with how good you are feeling. And when you are in that state, the relationship comes fast. But that’s not the point. Feeling oh so good with your ability to unconditionally focus was the sweet spot you were looking for and allowed yourself to feel and have.
“How will I let go of that without feeling the lack and need?”
You don’t let go of it, you focus on the emotional essence of it. What does intimacy feel like for you. And when you focus on what emotions you want to feel as a result of intimacy, then you allow yourself to feel fulfilled by those emotions now.
“I’ve managed to reach my personal and professional goals that’s why the love department is in the spotlight because that is the only thing left to look forward to.”
That can be part of it. I think the bigger piece is you felt you had more control in the other areas. You knew what you had to do to bring your desire to life. But when it comes to relationships and intimacy, you never really understood how you could go out and make it happen because it involves another person and their feelings, which you can’t control.
“I believe that relationships are the easiest to manifest more than job, money or material things.”
Your manifestations say otherwise. If you really believed relationships are easier, you wouldn’t have made a post about it. You would have made a post about how to get a job, money or material things before writing one on relationships.
It’s more like you’d like to believe it’s easier, or believe it’s easier for other people, but for you personally you don’t believe it is easier for you to manifest a relationship.
“I feel that my order in the restaurant is already cooked, I can see, smell, taste and feel my order but the waiter is still quite busy. If only I could just take my order from the kitchen I would do so, but that would interfere with the workflow in the kitchen.”
And that goes back to my previous point that in other areas of your life you probably felt, “Forget the waiter, I’m going to the kitchen and get it myself. I don’t need to wait on anybody to get what I want.” That’s why you’ve done so well in other areas. But when it comes to relationships, that same mindset doesn’t carry over because it’s not about making it happen, it’s allowing it to happen.
“. . . what am I doing wrong?”
The belief that you’re doing something wrong! That’s what’s wrong, ha ha. You believe you must be doing something wrong because you don’t have what you want. Why do you view not having the relationship as something that has gone wrong? Why do you need a relationship for it to be right? Why is having a relationship so damn important than unconditional alignment and happiness is just not good enough?
“How come I never found my vibrational match for 10 years . . .”
Because you keep telling the story you haven’t found your match for 10 years!
You keep telling the story, “I haven’t found my match. I haven’t found my match. I haven’t found my match. I haven’t found my match. I haven’t found my match. Where’s my match? Where’s my match? I want to find my match. But I haven’t found my match. Where’s my match, God? Where is it!? I’m tried of waiting. I’ve been waiting year after year. I’m tired of it!! Get off your omnipotent ass and get me my match!”
“How can I ever thank you?”
You just did. You’re welcome =).
“It’s just recently that I took notice about finding a partner, perhaps 2 years ago . . .”
Then at the very least stop saying ten years when it’s really two. Not talking about time altogether would be helpful, but at least you can accurately soften it. There, you just knocked off 80% of your old story.
You only feel lonely when you disconnect yourself from Source. When you’re in alignment, you could not feel lonely because you’re connected to who you really are which feels amazingly loved, supported and fun. When you’re not in alignment and rely on someone else to give you the connectedness feeling that can only come from your connection to who you really are, then you feel lonely.
There’s a difference between being alone and feeling lonely. You can be alone (which you never really are with all of your non-physical friends filling up your day with synchronous laughter and joy and helping you at all times), and not feel lonely. You can be single, and still feel full. Satisfied with your alignment and connection to many, many, many, many, many beings. But most importantly, connected to your Inner Being. When you disconnect yourself by focusing on what you don’t want, you feel lonely because your Inner Being knows nothing could be further from the truth. You feel bad because it’s not true. When you shift your focus to get back into alignment, you feel good again because you reconnect with the truth that you’re whole and perfect just the way you are. And your relationship is doing its best to come to you. You just want to relax, lighten up and be easier about things to let it in.
Yes, you are right Brian. I need to relax and lighten up and that is what this is all about, is for us to be happy and relaxed in order to allow the good things into our life. I just need people to remind me over and over again that this shouldn't be a struggle.
I agree with you too actually. I've been on the same boat as you, and have never been in a relationship and I'm 24, I've practiced the LOA for ten years as well. I started when I was 14 and currently till this date I have practiced every rule there is to follow, but I haven't found anyone yet either. So I completely empathize with you. People do call me beautiful as well! I'm very beautiful too actually. It's kind of surprising. I understand what you mean when people say oh wait for a bit or don't focus on it, it's exhausting.
It could be your limiting beliefs/blockages related to the issue, subconsciously. Have you ever given that a chance?
For me, I like women, and that's one of the reasons why I feel I have not been able to manifest because of my limiting belief that it's so hard to find women who like women. It was easy to attract men.
So maybe explore those beliefs and also start practicing a different story vibrationally. One where you have a mate, and feel how that would feel to you. You should manifest them.
You know your power :)