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Having fun with my family last night and laughing so hard my sides ache!

All I have asked for is on it's way right now and some arrives today!

NOW, NOW and NOW
LIFE!
Alignment!
Clarity
Passion
FUN
Freedom!
Abundance!
Love!
Brilliance!
Connection!
Simplicity!
Ease!

And

KNOWING I will ALWAYS BE HAPPY No Matter What!!!!!!

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Cool weather has returned, and I get to wear sweaters again. 

Between my job, selling jewelry and artwork, doing odd jobs here and there for other people, and the fact that my living expenses are so low, I accumulated a significant cash surplus over the past three years, and felt it was time to put it into investments. Formerly, I would have done a great deal of "homework" first, so I could justify my decision to other people and counter their criticisms. This time, however, I saw an opportunity and immediately knew it was right for me because it made me feel so good just to think about it. It was like fireworks going off. While I did do a little bit of "homework" (because sometimes I still want reassurance), I have since made the investment, and it feels great to think about it. It also feels great to think about how I can now trust my own inner guidance, without the need to justify my decisions to others. 

 

Yesterday, I borrowed my friend's little fast car and took a long drive to a huge bead store I have heard about, but never visited. It is something of a tourist destination, I understand. To my amazement, it was even bigger and nicer than I imagined, they carry just about every kind of bead imaginable, and the prices were excellent. I spent far more money than I anticipated, but I am so excited about all the earrings and other jewelry I am going to make and sell. Despite being tired when I arrived home last night, I sat at the dining room table and sorted beads and earwires into little bags so I can easily assemble them, and was excited by all the possibilities.

Because I was away from home during the summer, working in other cities and exploring during my free time, I have not made any art at all. Even weeks after returning, I still had not felt a strong urge to create. However, the simple act of putting beads of different colors, shapes, and textures together in new ways has given my creativity a fresh burst of energy, and I have spent this morning looking for holiday art and craft fairs to participate in, and thinking about new art works I would like to make. 

It is good to feel this sort of excitement again!

Sunday September 16th
Opportunity to sleep in and have a leisurely morning
Great breakfast, starting out with morning coffee
Got more work related items completed and organized
Sent out a review to a company for an item that I recently purchased
Said item is very well made, looks lovely, and was a bargain for the price
Weather was wonderfully cool and we had several really drastic downpours
The rain provided a nice, rhythmic sound and created an atmosphere of calm along the day
Also is great coffee drinking and sitting by the gas fireplace weather
Looking forward to work this week, will be full of social interactions and lots of activity

Sunday 16th September

Day off and another sunny, summer-Autumn day
Nice lie in until around 9.30am having slept well
Watching classic episodes of The Bill as I had breakfast
YouTube song from The Foundations (60's Britpop)
Playing catchy songs on my Alexa smart speakers
Cycling to Chiswell Green to get my fitness up
Feeling more confident riding, thanks to fixed brakes
Managed to pick up a bit of speed at certain points
Lovely latte coffee in Starbucks, beside the main road
I got the ideal people-watching seat by the main door
Playing the act-as-if game regarding my USA holiday
(Listing some imaginary Facebook status updates)
The lovely lady count was record-breakingly high today
Quizzing my Aunty by text about places to visit in LA
Very pleasant ride home through the country lanes
Once again, I picked up some speed in certain parts
Everton v West Ham was a pretty absorbing game
Surprisingly intellectual convo with Ray about utility bills
Long-ish evening walk around the country park extension
Had a very healthy dinner including a corn on the cobb
I have eaten and drunk very healthily (inc. 5 pints of water)
Playing some forgotten songs on my Alexa smart speaker
Researching places in LA, and the Californian film industry
Very brisk night walk around the local area affirming esteem
Playing romanticised chill-out songs on Alexa before bed

I have somewhere safe to stay and sleep where I can be content much of the time.
I can make Art today.
The weather is still decent.
I have ear plugs
I get to use the Internet a lot.

I get lots of time on my own tomorrow.
My new painting is really turning out nicely.
I have found a great place to move really soon!
Today went fine for me and I slept well.

Extra hours Monday, earning some surplus money
YouTube song from The Pasadenas (UK pop RNB)
Fairly quiet first thing, enabling us to get stuff done
Successful Internet order for a cute pregnant girl
Got through a whole load of repro and new lines
Helping Charlie to merchandise a load of blazers
Doing this, we had an excursion to the 3rd floor
The amusement of Hamida getting chatted up
An irate customer from a year ago was v. pleasant
I have come to realise that this is what she is like
Kellie the VM helped to get the till queues down
Finding a job lot of pens in the admin office upstairs
Further successful Internet orders for all sorts
Scaring Daz when he came in to buy a laptop bag
This was an amusing example of the law of karma
His new flat has gone through so he has a new home
I got out of having to do a suit fit right at the end
It was a lovely warm and sunny evening when I left
Riding home a different route and avoiding traffic
Riding home in sunshine and affluent areas was lovely
My Mum had brought some dinner round ready to eat
This went down a real treat as I was really hungry
My Aunty has given me £30 towards an airport taxi
The insight and analysis on Monday Night Football
The snooze I had on my bed once I had had my dinner
Reading Wikipedia articles about Los Angeles areas
Feeling excited about Santa Monica and Venice Beach
Playing beautiful ballads and visceral songs before bed

Today is one of my days off. I have the house to myself, and time to make earrings and begin some new art pieces to sell.

One of my first friends from my early days as a nomad is coming to this region to take a winter job, and I will see her again soon, possibly in time for my birthday on the 30th. Our paths have not crossed in three years so I appreciate social media, texting, and email for making it so easy for us to stay in contact. She is truly the "Wise Fool." When we first met, her ability to laugh in the face of misfortune and turn bad luck into a steady stream of jokes confused me. How could anybody find these things funny? However, she had not always been so lighthearted and resilient. Like me, she came from a very dysfunctional family and a bad marriage; like me, she abandoned everything and hit the road because it was the last acceptable option before suicide. She understood exactly where I had come from and the true nature of my mental and emotional struggles. She was the one who introduced me to the concept of "cognitive reframing," a process that was difficult for me at first, yet proved to be the knife that freed me from the tangled web of fear, grief, anxiety, and anger I was strangling myself in. There is no expressing how much this woman's kindness, humor, and understanding helped me pull myself up out of the darkness, and I am so excited to see her again, it is beyond words.   

Our neighbor came over this morning with the old rain jacket for my friend's dog, which she she repaired and improved by adding reflective stripes. She told me she was concerned last winter when I took him out for walks and runs along the road because he is dark-colored, and his rain jacket was plain dark green. I have for myself a yellow raincoat with reflective stripes, so I was visible, yet many times she could not even see the dog as we passed her house, and she worried for his safety. She also made two warm liners for it that fasten inside with snaps, and can be removed for washing. In other words, she put a lot of thought and effort into the dog's safety and well-being, when all we expected her to do was replace a bit of webbing and switch out a plastic rectangular loop for a metal one. I am very touched by this act of caring. As for the dog, he still hates to go out in the rain, but he gave her kisses anyway!

Nice lie in until 9.30am having slept well
YouTube song from The Herd (60's bubblegum)
Watching classic episodes of The Bill first thing
Brief stroll around the country park before lunch
Watching Chas N' Dave's knees up as I ate
Perfect warm-up for the afternoon shift at work
I felt fairly jovial and lively during the shift
There were quite a lot of us working which helped
The amusement of Lyes being a bit cheeky
The amusement of Ryan nosediving into middle age
I avoided a rather long-winded customer (time bandit)
A change to my hours on Saturday will benefit me
Chats with Ryan about social media and social class
Chats with Lisa about her plans to go to Newcastle
I think I calmed down her anxieties about the journey
We had quite a bit to do and time passed quickly
Ryan and me tidied the whole of the sale areas
Indu reckoned that we had done a very good job
Nice ride home in the breezy autumn sunshine
Being able to watch Champions League games live
Liverpool v PSG was an entertaining game finishing 3-2
It had the added drama of a last-minute winning goal
I have got a super shuttle ride booked for Los Angeles
My two ESTA's for USA and Canada have been approved
Day off tomorrow with a few fun things planned

Plenty of time alone today. And some time nonlinear. I slept well. I finished a very nice art piece.
I took it very easy today and Sunday I might take a long walk through an historic park.

This summer has been amazing. I've made some huge strides in my art career.

I have an art career. Holy shit!

I've seen so many great bands--some of them big names, some of them on their way up, some of them cult favorites--and ended up hanging out a lot with musicians. Seriously, musicians are way more fun and less neurotic (as a group) than visual artists (except maybe printmakers), and not only have I been making new friends, but getting really inspired by all the great new music that's come my way.

I designed a poster for one of my favorite semi-local bands, and one of their opening acts really liked it and asked me to design a new t-shirt and other merch for them. I said yes, so my art is going to be worn on total strangers' bodies, soon. 

I could see making a regular gig out of designing t-shirts, band logos, and posters, and maybe even doing album covers. I wasn't even thinking about this a year ago, but now it's like, "Yeah! Why not?" I can't believe how far things have come, and how fast.

And I've finally decided to learn how to play the guitar, which I didn't get to do as a kid, and as an adult always made a million excuses why I couldn't. I'm 50, so it's about damned time. If I can get just good enough to play punk rock, I'll be happy, LOL.

All is mostly quiet today so far.
I am just about done with my last art piece.
I get the apartment to myself this evening for a while.
I am determined to move to a particular area really soon to try it out.

Day off work getting some pre-holiday jobs done
Nice lie in until around 10am having slept well
YouTube songs from Toploader (early 00's Britpop)
My Mum, Aunty and nephew paid a quick visit
My nephew started apprehensively, but improved
He took a liking to all of the ornaments in my flat
He was intrigued by the Buddha and the sunbather
By the end of the visit he was laughing and giggling
He now wants to stand at every given opportunity
Won't be long until he is walking all by himself
Sunflower's handy hints about transit from SeaTac
Getting bus to St. Albans due to winds being strong
A convenient bus turned up pretty quickly for me
Despite the winds, it was quite warm and sunny
Nice cup of latte coffee in Costa Coffee once there
Finished off my 'acting as if' piece about my hols
I got an ideal people-watching seat at the back
Afterwards, I found an ideal journal in WH Smiths
I then found an ideal book to read on the flights
Convenient bus arrived at stop a minute or so early
The walk home from the bus stop was pretty pleasant
Lisa appreciated directions from Euston to Kings Cross
Reading my book about football tactics as I ate
Jogging around the country park in the early evening
In the football, Lyon shocked Man City by winning 2-1
Man City's goal kept things alive in the second half
Usefully, the remote control for my TV is working again
Helpful article about unhappiness creating skin disorders
Finding out about Venice Beach from Wikipedia entries
Feeling that it is going to be a fascinating place to visit
An interesting article about gratitude and healing of skin

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