Faith on my power of manifestation fading… with no apparent reason :(

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Permalink Reply by Mara on September 20, 2008 at 5:27am

Hi,
You have had a horrible shock, an emotional shock and it has knocked you off balance. It happened to me two years ago with my mother and she ended up in nursing home for 2 years before "giving up the ghost" so to speak. Her mind was gone and she would only recognise us for an instant when she saw us coming in the door then it was gone again. It was a dreadful 2 years but it taught me a lot. I realised that my mother as I knew her was long gone and what remained was just a shell because the other family members could not deal with it.

I could not stay in Ireland with her because of my business in Egypt, which I had nobody to look after. I had to come to terms with grief and guilt not to mention expenses of flying home. She died one week after I had returned to Egypt from a visit to Ireland. It was a miraculous death because it happened in the morning and both my brother and father were there (though it was at a time they should not have been there) She looked at my dad and in her eyes there was recognition and love. She silently nodded to him that all was well, closed her eyes and left. Those last minutes meant the world to my dad and my brother.

I could not get home for the funeral because no flights were available. But the other side of that was that I had never wanted to go to her funeral anyway. I look at death differently to my family and most if not all of the people who would have been there. I would not have been able for the usual funeral stuff. Instead I had the most amazing support of 6 fantastic australians who were staying in Mara House at the time. They should have been gone but one was bitten by a scorpion and so they had to rescedule their flights. It was one of the most amazing weeks of my life and I felt my mother so close.

During that time I also realised more deeply that we are all on our own individual journeys and it is important that we honour the roads our family members' spirits take. They have their own "thing" to do here and LOA is working with everyone whether they believe it or not.

I believe we can send love, positive thoughts and vibrations to others but ultimately it is up to them and their inner beings what to accept. We all have our own expansion to take care of in our own ways. For me it is easier to suffer myself than watch those near and dear to me suffer....but now I know that is something I have to honour and respect.

Your mother's inner being will be much happier if you take care of yourself and if you want to use the knowledge you now have access to you about LOA you must spend your time productively finding those good feeling thoughts and places.

I have found that when I vibrate on a high level ie. feeling as high and happy as I can that it ALWAYS appears to have a knock on effect on my family for the better. Conversely when I am in a negative, low vibration place they all seem to have problems. I don't know if that is my influencing them or that it has something to with meeting other apects of them in parallel dimensions!! Abraham says that if one person is vibrating in a good feeling place it is stronger than hundreds of people vibrating in a bad feeling place....or something like that.

So because I want my family to feel as good as they possibly can and to "wake up" to the LOA ...I spend every minute of every day (when I remember!!!) finding things to feel good about, pivoting when I find that I have drifted off course to focus on a negative. And when the negative happens I look for the benefit to be found in it as soon as I remember......and with practice I am catching myself and doing it faster.

It is always more difficult in a crisis or when there is something that devestates us emotionally to recover our balance....but those are the times of quantum leaps for us....we just have to remember to look for the positive in the negative....it is always there if we search long enough for it.

Think yourself about all the crazy and beautiful things you want to mainifest and that will take you to that good feeling place....the rest will be taken care of my LOA.

Sorry for the ramble and hope you get something helpful from it!

Much love and peaceful feelings to you.
Mara

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Permalink Reply by Gal on September 20, 2008 at 2:05pm

Hi, Mara

It is amazing how similar our story is. I’m in the US, my mom is in South America. There’s an affirmation story behind this, I’ll tell you another day :-) But during almost all her sickness we’ve been apart.

So when she got sick, and I was here, I felt terrible. I kept saying it was not my fault, but deep inside I was so guilty. I used some vacation days to visit her, and we were together for 7 days. During this time, she had an apparent recovery.

When I came back to the US, feeling all happy because she was better, this anaphylactic shock happens. The problem then switches from cancer to liver, and let me add she has C hepatitis, so everything that happens in the liver is rather problematic.

I couldn’t travel again, not enough vacation days. Plus I thought she would die before I arrive (takes two days flying to get to my country). And also, I thought that the US is my country now. People I love will live and die in South America, and we will be apart, that's the live I've chosen. Or maybe I was just selfish. Anyway, right or wrong, I didn’t go.

So I completely relate to you being far away from your mom. We feel not only hopeless because of their illness, but also we feel like we are not helping our loved ones who are handling the day-to-day of the illness. In my case, my dad, sister and grandma. I’m glad you had the support of friends during this time. I feel the magic of the world when strangers take such an important role in our life, and become friends.

Thankfully for me, my mom recovered. I’m sorry to know that yours didn’t :-( And here I am, complaining about my lack of faith, and here you are, trying to help.

I also have this connection with my family. But my family is very negative in general. So usually, when I’m ok, they’re just complaining about the world. When I’m in bad shape, they are falling apart. I have to say I was not in my best times when my mom became sick. But I hope they learned something out of all of this, is that how life is precious and how it’s a complete waste of time to hold on to your past tragedies. I know some people who had cancer and that completely changed their lives for the better. Maybe that’s what awaiting us?

Thank you! Thank you for sharing your story to help me! And success in Egypt. I’ve been to your homepage, made me feel like traveling. I’ve always wanted to visit Egypt, it’s in my list of places to go. Maybe we’ll meet in person one day.
-Gal

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Permalink Reply by Joy Falan on September 20, 2008 at 7:03am

Affirmagal, what a beautiful story about your mother's recovery! I have had similar experiences with sick family members, I just decide in my mind that they will be well again and refuse to entertain any doubts to the contrary - and somehow it always works out. (I think it does depend on whether they want to recover or not, some people choose to transition no matter what we do.)

I think that all you need to regain your faith is to simply reclaim your power! What works for me is to keep saying things like, "I choose to believe that ..." "I feel in my heart that..." "I have full faith that..." And fill in whatever you feel uncertain about.

As you said yourself, it works even if you don't really believe it! Just making a solid decision to believe (even if the true *knowing* isn't there yet) is enough to create shifts.

For starters, try this: "I choose to believe that I have the power to choose my reality right now."

It is also possible that you are simply shaken by the emotional impact of your mother's illness - that is one thing about illness, it can make us feel so helpless and frightened!

For that feeling of fear I would recommend affirmations like: "I know that all is well. I believe that the universe is always supporting and guiding me to my highest good. All is well, all is well, all is well, all is well...." Keep saying it until you feel it in your bones. :-)

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Permalink Reply by Awesome on September 20, 2008 at 10:12am

It is always a test of faith when we are trying to hold on to a love one who is ill or dying and it is a normal reaction, a human reaction, a learned reaction because of the fear we have inside of losing someone we hold so dear.....I will always have that fear but I have changed somewhat in my ability to TRUST & BELIEVE in God/The Universe/Source.....

I truly believe that although we cannot think and feel for others, we can use our power to move through others and see them in good health and I also have realized that sometimes it is best to let go, knowing that they are free from pain, that they are no longer suffering and it is my greatest belief that there is life after death, just not in the sense that we understand it.....

I have also learned that I found myself to be mourning out of my own selfishness, I didn't want someone to leave me, I loved them to much that I demanded they stay and I've learned that if their time is done on this earth, then it is done and they are in process of beginning a brand new chapter in their soul.....

I believe in my power in the beautiful gift of this knowledge, I've learned about me, and realizing that I am a part of a Greater Existence, I've learn to trust that WE ARE ONE and there is no beginning and no end and in that comfort of this understanding, I've learned how GLORIOUS life is and that it shouldn't be lived in VAIN - for every dark cloud there is a silver lining, for every obstacle there is an experience and most importantly ALL GOOD FOR ALL EXISTS, IT IS ALIVE AND WELL, it is our rightful heritage to become one in being with the ALMIGHTY.....So I do not hesistate at the opportunities I've been given, I TRUST & BELIEVE in myself and I LOVE with all my heart.......For me, faith is who I am, it's where I've been and it carries me to that of which is still unknown to me, it's where I visit with loved ones who have passed, and where I decipher all my challenges. It is LOVE in it's truest form and in this space, that of which belongs only to me, it allows me to draw an unlimited amount of strength, and where I keep my undying love for GOD.....

In the darkness you may face, in the unknown, it is in your faith that you know - light will follow.....
I am so very happy for you mom's recovery.....LOVE HER WITH ALL YOU HEART.....
Peace.....

Awesome

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Permalink Reply by Melody on September 20, 2008 at 11:22am

Glad that you mother is doing well now and I think everyone questions thier faith at one time. but all turns out well in the end.... what you need is just some good hugs to get you through this crazy thinking. (((((HUGS))))) hope this helps :>)

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Permalink Reply by Rinan.Go on September 20, 2008 at 1:43pm

wow this devotion happens to be today topics . hope this boost u and give u help . remember faith comes by knowing that how much god loves u and want u tobe happy and your family well, not u trying to have have more faith but by cultivating how much god adores and want the best for whatever u want. GOd calls it that as faith .

Believe That God Is Your Rewarder

Hebrews 11:6
6But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

Most people quote only the first part of Hebrews 11:6 — “without faith it is impossible to please Him”. Yet, it goes on to say, “for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him”. In other words, the faith that pleases God is the kind of faith that believes that God exists and that He is a rewarder.

The Bible also says that “faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”. (Hebrews 11:1) So even in times of difficulty, when we don’t see good things happening in our circumstances, we are to believe that God will turn things around and reward us.

God turned things around for Ruth, the Moabite widow, when she believed the Lord and made Him her God. (Ruth 1:16) The Bible tells us that she was given a “full reward” by the Lord when she came under His wings for refuge. (Ruth 2:12) Not only did He give her protection, He also gave her abundant provision, exceeding favor and a glorious redemption. (Ruth 2:9–17, 3:11, 4:10–13)

When Rahab, the harlot of Jericho, heard reports of how the Lord had opened up the Red Sea for the children of Israel, she believed that “He is God in heaven above and on earth beneath”. (Joshua 2:9–11) Though Rahab had not personally witnessed the miracles, she believed God and hid the Jewish spies from their pursuers. (Joshua 2:4–6) Because of her faith, she not only did not perish with those who did not believe (Joshua 6:25, Hebrews 11:31), but she was also given a place in the “hall of faith” in Hebrews 11.

God was so pleased with the faith of these two Gentile women that He not only blessed them in their lifetimes, but He also put them into the genealogy of His Son Jesus Christ, the great Redeemer and rewarder.

Beloved, when you come to the Lord with your needs, believe that He is God, and that He is a rewarder. God has pleasure in this kind of faith. He wants to be the rewarder of your faith in Him!

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Permalink Reply by Gal on September 20, 2008 at 2:56pm

Thanks everyone for your comments

The thing is… I’m super lucky. I’m not rich, but I materialized everything I really wanted. I’m a model to my sister, and although I tried to teach her about LoA, I think she’s not prepared yet. Let’s see.

I’ve filled notebooks with affirmations, and the cool thing about affirmations is that it leaves a trace. So you can go back to your books and see what you materialized and how long did it take. I know I materialized everything I ever asked for, except being a millionaire. But to be honest, while I was doing the millionaire affirmations, a little thing ringed in my brain saying “Quit your job and do this!”. And I chickened out :-) So I’m not going to say it didn’t work. Let’s say I’m the one who’s not prepared to follow her insights. Or maybe I’m just not willing to take risks for this, meaning I don’t really want it. Whatever :-) I live well.

So I always trusted affirmations and LoA. Never completely, I must say – always a seed of distrust. But I trusted them.

And after my mom got sick, something hit me. What if I’m just super lucky? What if it’s all a coincidence and there’s nothing to do with affirmations or LoA? What if I’m not blessed at all? I can’t keep my mom alive forever. One day she’ll die. I don’t have superpowers. What if there’s nothing to it? Just chance?

I know those who think positive succeed, and I never saw a positive person who looked like a loser nor a negative leader. There are times you feel negative – but that’s different from being negative. So there is definitely something to it. Plus, I know intention can influence physical devices to some extent. That was studied and published by Princeton University researches for 30 years at PEAR: http://www.princeton.edu/~pear/

(parenthesis…)

Weird thing about PEAR, is that Princeton always wanted to close it. They thought it was an embarrassment. PEAR went through several inspections, and they never found anything wrong with their experiments. So they had to keep it open. Also, PEAR could never publish papers on important scientific magazines. It’s not that the papers were wrong – simply the magazines refused to read them. After 30 years of trying to make the world review their work, the researchers closed the lab in 2007.

That shows how the world is simply not prepared for the secret yet.

PEAR found that any human brain can influence 2 out of 10,000 coin flips. The coin flips were machine generated, so there's no human factor here other than the brain. So, if you do 10,000 coin flips, thinking you want it to be “face”, the tendency is to be 4998 crowns and 5002 face. They did this experiment for 30 years, and the consistency of the results make the chance of being just luck to less than one in a billion. Look for Princeton PEAR over the internet.

That might sound ridiculous, only 2 out of 10,000. But if you think on the millions of brains we come in contact during the day, the million of tiny actions and atoms – the billions of “coin flips” we do a day, that is actually significant when it comes to your life.

(…closing parenthesis)

So I know the LoA actually works. I know it. But that’s different from feeling it. And this feeling is the one who’s been fading away.

But guys, let me tell you all something. Simply writing about this is actually making me feel better. Thank you!

Also, I’ve been reading your comments to this and other posts, and I realized I’m missing the gratitude part. I’m not the best human being in the world. I try to do good, but deep inside I’m very selfish and scared and afraid. I realize this problem I have. I just need to let the gratitude fill in the space occupied by greed and selfishness.

What do I have to complain? My mom is alive. Thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I have a person who loves me, and we’ll get married soon. Thank you! I have a great job, and I’m good at it. Thank YOU!!!
Love, -Gal

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Permalink Reply by Awesome on September 20, 2008 at 3:46pm

The more you are thankful for, the more that will come.....

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Permalink Reply by Amelia on September 20, 2008 at 4:19pm

This is a fascinating post! And, thank YOU for helping me find ways to renew my own faith. I am going to look up PEAR on the internet.

I am grateful to hear that your mother is okay :)

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Permalink Reply by Gal on September 20, 2008 at 4:45pm

:-)
I'm so glad that my search for support is helping other people too. This is much more than I was expecting. Thanks, Amelia!

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Permalink Reply by Gal on September 20, 2008 at 5:10pm

Oh, here is a link to a NY Times article on PEAR, just after it shuts down:
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/10/science/10princeton.html?ref=science

I'm not a PEAR advocate, but scientists were never able to debunk the results. What they said is that it wasn't a paranormal anomaly - which I agree. They also said the interpretation of results was wrong, and that they were a normal statistical deviation - which I don't know, I'm not a mathematician.

But for me, this is the first time I see numbers about what was always my core belief behind affirmations, and that's rather nice :-)

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Permalink Reply by Amelia on September 20, 2008 at 5:51pm

Thank you for putting this up :) I will check it out! From what I have learned about science, NOTHING can really be "proven" per se, but studies can provide evidence to support theories...and the more evidence, the stronger the theory (I think). So, if nothing can really be "proven", nothing can really be "disproven" either. If scientists aren't able to debunk these results, it would seem they offer pretty significant evidence to me. I will definitely check it out :)

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