Fear of opening a business. Any Suggetions?

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Permalink Reply by Leonard M. Rubino on May 1, 2009 at 2:48pm

The best way to get over your FEAR of failure is to first understand that FEAR stands for False Evidence Appearing Real.
Second adopt a Ready Fire Aim phylosophy.
READY... You are ready to take the first step.
Fire... You do the first thing you need to do to own a business pick a name and incorpoate it.
Aim...Start without worrying about the direction or final result. keep moving and adjusting your aim as the situation presents itself.

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Permalink Reply by lcplgans on May 2, 2009 at 1:18am

Thank you for your reply! After reading this, I realize this is exactly the philosophy that I have been using for the past two years! What I am going through is not something new, I started off in a completely different direction then where I am now. My ideas, direction and "aim" has evolved from doing something that I knew I could make some money on the side that I really didn't enjoy doing to something I can make a lot of money at and will love doing it! You've made me realize that I am still on the path, not a different road. Thank you!

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Permalink Reply by Awesome on May 1, 2009 at 4:06pm

Hey Jeff - it's really pretty simple when you think about it - you old way of thinking was pretty redundant and never allowed you to truly grow - and although you may still have some doubt - you know deep down inside - YOU DO HAVE THE POTENTIAL and really, the only thing that has ever held you back were those insecurities - WHAT PURPOSE HAVE THEY SERVED YOU? Isn't that enough reason to get rid of those feelings?

If you do keep up that mentality you will fail - you have failed over and over and over again and that should be enough to convince you to want to do things otherwise - SO DO IT!

Give yourself the opportunity, TRUST YOU, TRUST THAT YOU ARE ENTITLED TO A LIFE OF DREAMS!
Awesome

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Permalink Reply by lcplgans on May 2, 2009 at 1:23am

Thank you for your reply!

I spent 6 years in the Marine Corps and back then, you couldn't have convinced me that I couldn't do something. Well, I've been out in the "Civilian World" now for seven years and some of those pre-Marine day thoughts have crept back in.

But, you are absolutley right, I have to get back into that mode of thinking again. Take charge of my fear and make this happen. Thank you very much for making me realize that!

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Permalink Reply by Lee Wise on May 1, 2009 at 5:55pm

Quick, off the cuff thoughts:

________________________
Advice, Assessment and Personal Evaluation

Seek help from those who know you and who you trust --
especially those who can say the hard things and you trust
them.

Think in terms of the skill sets necessary to begin this
business you are thinking about beginning and be ruthless in
your thinking about past successes and failures.

Brainstorm with these folks about your *real* possibilities
of making this business happen.

Maybe even some types of personality tests would be worth
looking into. For instance, my background has to do with
training pastoral interns. Included in this group are
certain folks that are interested in starting churches in
various places around the world.

Those folks -- the ones who desire to begin churches -- have
a certain set of motivations and skills that for the most
part can be tested.

________________________
Fears

Fears can be placed in perspective: sure. But in the it is
my feeling that if they are not controlled that could be a
danger point for anyone.

It seems to me that at some point strong vision, a certain
level of confidence, and big enough "reasons" for your
adventure would have to provide you with the *sustained
effort* needed to push through inevitable setbacks and
disappointments. .

Are these possible?
Answer: Of course, many people push through these things.

________________________
Step By Step Possibilities?

A good question to ask yourself may be...

"Are there certain smaller steps of action that I could take
which would allow me to see if this might be the right
direction I should head, or at least confirm a next smaller
step?"

________________________
Confidence and Education

Depending on what the direction you are going to test out,
would any type of investment in training to do what you
would like to do be possible?

Would it be possible to lay out a personal development plan
that would:

1. Acquaint you with your specialized field of interest,

2. And provide you with some training to help you grow in
your understanding of what it takes to make it in your field
of endeavor?

In this way your confidence might be built up along
providing some possible "confirming steps" along the way.


The best to you,

Lee

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Permalink Reply by lcplgans on May 2, 2009 at 1:40am

Thank you for your reply! The idea I am working on has to do with a website with car videos on it. There's more to it, but like I said before, I don't want to get into specifics (yet). Anyway, I have several family members and friends that are employed into or own a business in the automotive industry that could be considered my core audience, my clients or both. I also trust each of them to give me constructive feedback and not just tell me what I want to hear.

"In this way your confidence might be built up along providing some possible "confirming steps" along the way." This struck something in me when I read this. I don't have to do the all or nothing approach. There 4 different parts to my plan and each of those can be broken down farther into sub categories. I will start with one or two, if it works, move to the next. If not; regroup and march forward.

Once again, Thank you!

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Permalink Reply by Lee Wise on May 2, 2009 at 5:38pm

You are most welcome, of course. Glad one or two ideas "clicked." Enjoy the ride!

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Permalink Reply by Hooked on Sparkles on May 2, 2009 at 1:01am

Can you stay in touch with what excites you about it? Keep your focus there. Remind yourself why you want to do this. Feel how good it is to follow your dream. Trust that good feeling as your guidance for yourself that you CAN do it.

The only thing that IS limiting you IS the fear. I KNOW how that feels. False Evidence Appearing Real does fit, because the fear is not the pursuit in itself.

The LOA is about YOU telling yourself you're on the right path. YOU. Not something outside yourself. Affirm the goodness of YOU as your guide. That's why I get scared -- because I'm paying attention to all the fears and the things that are OUT THERE that could go wrong.

Every now and then I realize that everything I need to make things work is all inside this little package I call ME. Inside, from the center out. I carry all the tools I need with me every single day, all the confidence, all the power, all the enthusiasm. Fear is kind of like static on the radio that you get when you've got your dial tuned off your station.

When you get on your station, you feel good. When you get off, you feel bad, scared.

If you imagined doing this project, and pretended that there was no fear involved, but that you were just out there blithely and happily and energetically pursuing what you wanted to do, does it feel good? If there were no limitations, nothing to stop you, would this be what you'd do? Or is there something else?

Not that there has to be ONE SPECIFIC thing that you're destined to do. You may have a number of things in mind. You may choose one because it seems more doable in light of your situation, but it's something you really would love doing.

Then realize that you CAN do it.

Now and then, you'll have feelings and fears. That's OK. Allow yourself to have them, welcome them, and embrace them (that is, don't fight them). Just feel them. Just sit and say, "Oh, there's that fear again." Walk around in it and realize that it is only a feeling, and you can feel it, and even just sort of examine it and investigate it: "H-m-m, how very interesting. This is fear. It's like a tightness in my gut. It's like pins and needles on my neck." When you do that, fear loses its grip because you're not fighting it. Lean into it, let it be, soothe it, say nice things to it, treat it like an itty-bitty baby.

"Awww, aren't you sweet, you just wanna be loved, don't you?" (sense of humor here...)

Good luck with it...

Mary Jo

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Permalink Reply by lcplgans on May 2, 2009 at 2:00am

Thank you for your reply!

I am working at a TV station and I am currently under a contract. It has been my goal to not resign my contract when it is up, but rather start my own ad agency company. I figured, while I am waiting for that day to come, I would do some jobs on the side that is more consumer based. You can check it out at www.wweffects.com . When I was really excited about it and used what I learned of LOA, I had customers flock to me! It was great!

But, a month or two ago, I realized that I should focus my energy on what I plan to support my family on rather than the "make some money on the side" job. It seems like the moment I shifted my focus, the customers stopped coming to that side of the business. I did get a couple of customers that needed corporate videos, just like I would be doing in my ad agency business!!!

And just a side note here: I did not do anything different, I didn't stop advertising for the consumer stuff and I didn't start advertising for the ad agency stuff. Things just "fell into my lap".

If that doesn't show what LOA can do, I don't know what can. If it worked before, it will work again for this new idea, right?

Why did it take your reply to remind me of this? Especially since it was only a couple of months ago.

Thanks again

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Permalink Reply by Wings on May 2, 2009 at 2:04am

I've been down this road, started my own successful business after failing several times before. I made money (not a fortune, but enough to live a nice life), sold the business and I am starting up something else again. The point is that I liked every step of the way, even though there were and still are a lot of unforeseen problems and disappointments to be overcome.

I truely believe that you should be doing something that you find to be exciting and interesting. Successful businesses are created by the heart, not by the head and a business plan. And then there is this golden rule: stop worrying, get going !!!
Good luck and enjoy the ride.

Keep on flying !!!

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Permalink Reply by Abhay Khurana on May 2, 2009 at 9:19pm

Hey Jeff, (btw, I do video too)

There have been many great responses previous to mine, so I won't repeat what they have said.

I'd just like to add, though, that you are 100% responsible and capable for creating what you want in this and in every situation.

No one else is capable or responsible for creating your life.

It sounds like the services that you have provided in the past have been reciprocated with well, and that you don't have a lot of difficulty in getting customers.

My advice would be to come to crystal clear clarity about your goal of this business.

Why is this goal important to you?

How will you feel when you achieve this goal?

What qualities do you need to connect with in order to achieve that goal? <- Most important, IMHO.

I think that if you can answer these 3 questions clearly, you will have much less difficulty overcoming that fear. When the goal is so clear and so valuable to you, you cannot be stopped.

-Abhay Khurana

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