My boyfriend and I broke up two months ago and finally got back together this past weekend! :) Prior to our breakup I had never intentionally used the law of attraction and actually did not know much about it. I realized that a couple of my closest friends had been using LOA to manifest many of the things already in their lives, so I decided to try it out. I was so skeptical but gave it a shot. BOY DID IT WORK!
I also want to say that our breakup was terrible - I mean TERRIBLE. I honestly thought we were over for good from how terrible and downright evil we had been towards one another towards the end of the relationship, so I promise whatever the reason for the breakup, the law of attraction WILL work.
So this is how I did it!
1. I cut off all contact. I blocked him on facebook, instagram, snapchat, everything. You personally don't have to do this, but for me, seeing his profile only made me obsessive and jealous and that will make you enter into a state of desperation which is not conducive with getting your ex back - it'll just create resistance.
2. I had to take a step back and assess and accept why we broke up. IT WAS ME! I was obsessive and crazy and had unrealistic expectations. I accused him of cheating and sent SO much negative energy towards the relationship. In the same way that you can manifest success in a relationship, you can also manifest a breakup, which, go figure, I did exactly that.
3. I took back control of my life and I focused 110% on ME! I already KNEW he was coming back so I focused all of my energy on becoming the best version of myself and being the person and the partner that I wanted to be. I got into shape, took care of myself, read a lot, spent time with my family and friends and focused on my career. I laughed a lot and developed a true love for my life. I put myself on a pedestal. I mentally created a beautiful gold pedestal and would get up on that pedestal, and envision myself as my most beautiful, happiest self. In this life, we only have ourselves and the sooner we begin loving and appreciating ourselves for everything we are, the happier we will be! I realize now that my lovely boyfriend was never able to make me happy because I wasn't happy with myself. When you are unhappy inside, nothing external can make you happy. But when you find happiness within your soul, that happiness will spill into every other aspect of your life.
4. I lived my life in gratitude. I wrote in my gratitude journal every single morning and would take a walk outside each day and think of all the things I'm grateful for. I shifted my perspective to an abundance mindset. I saw all of the beautiful blessings in life and oh my goodness, the amount of love and generosity I experience from life now still amazes me. Just this morning, a stranger bought me coffee because he said that he could feel the love of life in my heart and wanted to do something kind for me. TRUST ME, people can feel your energy!
5. I visualized at least once a day. I visualized every single morning after writing in my gratitude journal, as my heart was in a good state, ideal for visualization. I also visualized if I felt like it throughout the day, but did not think too much about it. You do NOT have to visualize all the time for your manifestation to come to life! If anything, visualizing a lot could potentially be detrimental, as it could lead to feelings of desperation and lack.
6. I sent him lots of loving thoughts and lived "as if." Whenever I would think of him I would tell him loving things and send him thoughts of love and warmth. I NEVER EVER sent him any negative thoughts. I believed he was already mine. I never called him my ex and only called him by his name or as "my boyfriend."
7. I let go. I KNOW. It's SO hard. But doing all of the work on myself and focusing on my own growth made me realize a few things:
- I am not the only lucky one! My boyfriend was also lucky to have an amazing girlfriend like me!
- If he is the one, then he is the one. If he is truly mine, then the universe will bring us back together.
I know it's hard, but you have to trust that the universe is doing the absolute best for you.
So here's how everything went down. The week before we got back together, I knew that he'd be coming back soon. I have no idea how, but I knew. I changed his name in my phone back to the pet name I had called him and looked at a picture of him and spoke loving thoughts to it. I cut off all the other men I had been casually dating and told my friends and family that me and him were back together. I needed a favor from him that week so I casually texted him asking if he'd help me out. He happily obliged and asked me to get dinner.
He picked me up and could not stop staring at me. He said that I looked different - that it was like happiness was just radiating from me. At dinner, he also mentioned that I seemed a lot calmer and happier. Eventually, he broke down and told me that he missed me and couldn't imagine his life without me. I laughed it off and changed the topic. He brought it back up and said he missed me every single day of our breakup and thought of me non-stop. He said he constantly felt my presence around him and that being with me in person made him realize he doesn't want another day without me in his life. He asked me to please take him back and I said okay, maybe I kinda miss you, let's try again. We are now back together and honestly, we are so happy. Also the breakup was the best thing in the world because as much as I love him, it made me learn to love myself! I learned how amazing and wonderful I am and that I am the star of my own show, not him!
Also, my boyfriend is not the kind of guy to EVER go back to an ex, or "try again" or anything like that. He is the most stubborn man in the WORLD. He is also not an emotional person, so I'm telling you that this was definitely the work of the universe. If I got him back, you can get your ex back too!
Also, I'm happy to answer any questions if anyone has them! Just remember, the universe is working FOR YOU!!
UPDATE APRIL 2018
Be careful what you wish for! When my ex and I were reunited I was SO excited to share with him how I had grown and to show him how much more positive and mature our relationship could be - unfortunately for us, he did not have the same level of growth.
Things were difficult once again and I chose to break them off, this time around. I had no intentions of actually going back! I kept telling myself "I wish things we could just start over" - I visualized us starting over, from the beginning, us forgetting the pain and putting it behind us.
Something inspired me to reach out to him! I contacted him asking to get coffee and when we did, things felt different. He was shocked that I had wanted to see him, but happy to see me. I mentioned that I missed him, and he said "no, things are different, let's not talk about the past."
We've been on a couple of dates since and have a few more planned. I didn't realize that this is what I wanted, but the universe truly gave me a do-over! I will keep you all posted on any major developments.
Until then, HAPPY MANIFESTING!
UPDATE MAY 2018
So I thought I'd give a little update to you all since there have been some very interesting developments!
I decided to let my boyfriend go, COMPLETELY. I prayed and prayed and prayed and asked the universe for guidance. Shortly afterwards, I mean within days, I met another man. It was very random, very abrupt, but this particular man has literally EVERY. SINGLE. THING. I've asked the universe for...some things I didn't even realize I wanted. I have completely let go of my ex-boyfriend and wish him nothing but the best, but this experience has taught me that the universe truly does know best and it is only when you let go of something and are not attached to it that the best outcome can manifest. Notice that I did not say "I got him back," but that the BEST OUTCOME OCCURRED! It may be hard to hear but sometimes the best outcome is one that we do not think we want, and is actually NOT being with that person, but our resistance and desire to control causes us to block the universe from doing its thing. Stop resisting, stop blocking and TRUST AND BELIEVE that God, the Universe, whatever Higher Power you believe in, is working on creating the absolute BEST for you! And just to remind you all, I pined after this man for EIGHT YEARS, truly thought he was the love of my life, NEVER imagined anyone else taking his place, never imagined feeling those feelings again, but not only was I able to get over it, but am so much happier today. I've truly learned that the Universe knows best and will deliver the absolute best to me because that's what I deserve! Thank you all for being there for me on this journey and supporting my learning and growth during this time! Happy manifesting!
Lots of love,
Wooww that's amazing! Wish you all the best!!
thank you!!! :)
thank you! :)
i'm so happy to hear this babe... and you just gave me another strength to go on and never lose faith ... i love myself but missing him makes me break down oftenly.. to my friends i still tell them that we are together ... i just hope it will be a miracle after all ... and reading your post , i wanna show the world that miracles do happen in life... :)
You have to remember to love yourself more than you love him! The love you have for yourself will always be the greatest love in your life! You are so wonderful and worthy of all of the goodness in the world, I hope you never forget that!
thank you leila... i feel so much better today and i promise to love myself more than anything and anyone in the world ... :) i want to be a much better gf to him in future ...
THANK YOU! I'm super grateful to have him back in my life. :)
In terms of visualization, I alternated between using remote seduction and visualizing all of the things I wanted him to say to me. I tried not to use our memories when visualizing, because I knew that I could never go back, so I focused on creating the relationship that I wanted with him, instead of wanting something I could not have. Dwelling too much on memories may have you inadvertently focused on the lack of your boyfriend, since you're focusing on memories that no longer are. So what I would do is try to be happy if a memory came back, but when visualizing, I would visualize all of the places where I want him to take me, I would visualize us having a good time, I would visualize him telling me he loves me, him telling his friends and family about me, anything I wanted. I mentioned that I would also do remote seduction. The idea behind that is to create a strong sexual desire in your partner. I would visualize myself during a sexual act with him and focus on his pleasure. If done correctly, you will be able to subconsciously create desire in him. I alternated between the two. Lanie Stevens has great resources on remote seduction. I also read the book creative visualization by Shakti Gawain, and that helped me learn to visualize. I also think that keeping my spirits high was super helpful. I read a lot of self help books and listened to a podcast each day - either Oprah's super soul conversations or something by Tony Robbins. I also watched a lot of youtube videos - Leeor Alexandra is great and super inspirational! I also read a bunch of success stories to keep me motivated. People get with their exes back every day - of course it can happen to you too!
If I ever had memories that were painful, I allowed myself to feel sad for the moment - I don't believe suppressing your feelings is healthy - but I would redirect my thoughts. For example, when my boyfriend and I had broken up, he had told me he never saw me romantically and just saw me as a friend. This was super hurtful and I'd get sad sometimes, let myself feel sad but then tell myself "okay, but that was in that moment, and you are creating a happy future with him." It's NORMAL to feel sad. Trying to force yourself to feel anything may actually work against you. Also, working on yourself and your own happiness will help you immensely. I did take a step back and think of all the ways in which I contributed to the demise of our relationship and worked on, and am still working on improving those traits about myself. I really focused on falling in love with myself, and now I actually feel like yes, I love my boyfriend, but even if we were to ever break up again, I'm okay with it because I love myself!
Also, remember that you attracted him before, you can totally do it again! :)
Hope that helps <3
Your story really gives me hope. My situation is more or less similar to yours. But my break-up wasn't terrible at all, it was OK. He wanted to finish everything while I didn't, so it was really painful for me, but seeing that you got your ex back even after a terrible break-up gives me hope that I'll get mine soon, especially because our break-up was not terrible and even then he told me good things about me, such as how amazing I am. My guy is also very stubborn (as he said), but he is a bit emotional, so I guess there is hope for me as well.
If you want to talk, then we can talk via private messages more. I have here, on the PI forum, two stories that you can read: one of them is about the story with my ex, so I won't have to say it to you again, and the other one is about sings from the Universe that I've been encountering since I started this thing with LOA (I've been getting other signs as well since I posted that story, but we'll talk via messages, if you'd like ^^).
And I also have some questions to ask you, such as: how and what did you visualize? How did you get to be so grateful for everything you had? My gut feeling is confused: sometimes I have a strong confidence that he is on his way to me, but sometimes, doubts kick in. The good part is that I've been managing lately to start fighting against these doubts, to make them go away, and make myself concentrate on what I REALLY want (i.e. him coming back when the time is right).
No matter how the relationship ended, you can attract him back, if that is your goal. Anything is possible, and as I told Nat, if you attracted him once, then you can totally attract him back again. Your boyfriend was attracted to your energy at the beginning of your relationship, so you want to focus on getting yourself back to the energy that you possessed at that time, that initially attracted him. I read your story, and it was weird that mine was actually very similar to yours. I also got very possessive towards the end of the relationship and got extremely clingy. I became overbearing! In other words, my energy was totally off. In terms of LOA, when you want something so desperately to NOT happen, you will actually manifest it. Your fear of breaking up with him did manifest, just as mine did.
My boyfriend and I had also broken up right on new years - so weird! But, here's the thing, it's been how long? Almost two months, and you're still alive and doing great :) For me, realizing that I have my own life and can actually not only survive, but do GREAT without him was key. In terms of gratitude, I started practicing gratitude every morning. I woke up and would not get out of my bed until I thought of at least three things that I was grateful for. I would do nice favors for people. I began buying my mother flowers once a week. My mentality was to take all of the love that I had for my boyfriend and give it to the world. I took my friends out to dinner. I spent time in nature every single day. I said hello to strangers. I treated myself to pedicures and baths and read every single day. I also started dating other men - nothing serious, but it helped me remind me that I am capable of being loved and deserve love. Also, don't feel too bad about being conflicted, I felt this too. Eventually, I just came to a place where I was so in love with my life that it just didn't matter if he came back or not - as much as I wanted him to, I knew that I would still be happy, because happiness comes from within me, not any external force. I also listened to a lot of podcasts - Oprah is great!
In terms of visualization, I first accepted that the relationship that we had is over and that the relationship that I am creating with him now is a brand new, WAYY BETTER relationship. So I tried not to dwell too much on the past. I would visualize us on dates, us moving in together, us being married, us having fun together, him talking about me to his friends. The funny thing is, he told me that he talked about me to his friends nonstop and he just asked me if I'd consider moving in with him sometime this year, so we are working towards that too (thank you, universe)! I would limit my visualization to once a day - you don't want to obsess over it. I would only do it when I felt 100% absolutely wonderful and grateful and then visualize all of the things I wanted him to say to me. When visualizing, I also would make sure to see him as though he was right in front of me, and not as if I was on the outside looking in. Some good resources if you want to learn more are "Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain, anything by Neville Goddard, youtube also has wonderful resources! Leeor Alexandra is one of my favorite youtubers, and explains the law of attraction quite well.
Also, something that I realize helped me was that my mentality was "okay, my boyfriend just needs some space - this is a great time for me to just focus on myself and be the best girlfriend that I can be for him." so focusing on myself became a lot easier. :)
hope that helps!