My boyfriend and I broke up two months ago and finally got back together this past weekend! :) Prior to our breakup I had never intentionally used the law of attraction and actually did not know much about it. I realized that a couple of my closest friends had been using LOA to manifest many of the things already in their lives, so I decided to try it out. I was so skeptical but gave it a shot. BOY DID IT WORK!
I also want to say that our breakup was terrible - I mean TERRIBLE. I honestly thought we were over for good from how terrible and downright evil we had been towards one another towards the end of the relationship, so I promise whatever the reason for the breakup, the law of attraction WILL work.
So this is how I did it!
1. I cut off all contact. I blocked him on facebook, instagram, snapchat, everything. You personally don't have to do this, but for me, seeing his profile only made me obsessive and jealous and that will make you enter into a state of desperation which is not conducive with getting your ex back - it'll just create resistance.
2. I had to take a step back and assess and accept why we broke up. IT WAS ME! I was obsessive and crazy and had unrealistic expectations. I accused him of cheating and sent SO much negative energy towards the relationship. In the same way that you can manifest success in a relationship, you can also manifest a breakup, which, go figure, I did exactly that.
3. I took back control of my life and I focused 110% on ME! I already KNEW he was coming back so I focused all of my energy on becoming the best version of myself and being the person and the partner that I wanted to be. I got into shape, took care of myself, read a lot, spent time with my family and friends and focused on my career. I laughed a lot and developed a true love for my life. I put myself on a pedestal. I mentally created a beautiful gold pedestal and would get up on that pedestal, and envision myself as my most beautiful, happiest self. In this life, we only have ourselves and the sooner we begin loving and appreciating ourselves for everything we are, the happier we will be! I realize now that my lovely boyfriend was never able to make me happy because I wasn't happy with myself. When you are unhappy inside, nothing external can make you happy. But when you find happiness within your soul, that happiness will spill into every other aspect of your life.
4. I lived my life in gratitude. I wrote in my gratitude journal every single morning and would take a walk outside each day and think of all the things I'm grateful for. I shifted my perspective to an abundance mindset. I saw all of the beautiful blessings in life and oh my goodness, the amount of love and generosity I experience from life now still amazes me. Just this morning, a stranger bought me coffee because he said that he could feel the love of life in my heart and wanted to do something kind for me. TRUST ME, people can feel your energy!
5. I visualized at least once a day. I visualized every single morning after writing in my gratitude journal, as my heart was in a good state, ideal for visualization. I also visualized if I felt like it throughout the day, but did not think too much about it. You do NOT have to visualize all the time for your manifestation to come to life! If anything, visualizing a lot could potentially be detrimental, as it could lead to feelings of desperation and lack.
6. I sent him lots of loving thoughts and lived "as if." Whenever I would think of him I would tell him loving things and send him thoughts of love and warmth. I NEVER EVER sent him any negative thoughts. I believed he was already mine. I never called him my ex and only called him by his name or as "my boyfriend."
7. I let go. I KNOW. It's SO hard. But doing all of the work on myself and focusing on my own growth made me realize a few things:
- I am not the only lucky one! My boyfriend was also lucky to have an amazing girlfriend like me!
- If he is the one, then he is the one. If he is truly mine, then the universe will bring us back together.
I know it's hard, but you have to trust that the universe is doing the absolute best for you.
So here's how everything went down. The week before we got back together, I knew that he'd be coming back soon. I have no idea how, but I knew. I changed his name in my phone back to the pet name I had called him and looked at a picture of him and spoke loving thoughts to it. I cut off all the other men I had been casually dating and told my friends and family that me and him were back together. I needed a favor from him that week so I casually texted him asking if he'd help me out. He happily obliged and asked me to get dinner.
He picked me up and could not stop staring at me. He said that I looked different - that it was like happiness was just radiating from me. At dinner, he also mentioned that I seemed a lot calmer and happier. Eventually, he broke down and told me that he missed me and couldn't imagine his life without me. I laughed it off and changed the topic. He brought it back up and said he missed me every single day of our breakup and thought of me non-stop. He said he constantly felt my presence around him and that being with me in person made him realize he doesn't want another day without me in his life. He asked me to please take him back and I said okay, maybe I kinda miss you, let's try again. We are now back together and honestly, we are so happy. Also the breakup was the best thing in the world because as much as I love him, it made me learn to love myself! I learned how amazing and wonderful I am and that I am the star of my own show, not him!
Also, my boyfriend is not the kind of guy to EVER go back to an ex, or "try again" or anything like that. He is the most stubborn man in the WORLD. He is also not an emotional person, so I'm telling you that this was definitely the work of the universe. If I got him back, you can get your ex back too!
Also, I'm happy to answer any questions if anyone has them! Just remember, the universe is working FOR YOU!!
UPDATE APRIL 2018
Be careful what you wish for! When my ex and I were reunited I was SO excited to share with him how I had grown and to show him how much more positive and mature our relationship could be - unfortunately for us, he did not have the same level of growth.
Things were difficult once again and I chose to break them off, this time around. I had no intentions of actually going back! I kept telling myself "I wish things we could just start over" - I visualized us starting over, from the beginning, us forgetting the pain and putting it behind us.
Something inspired me to reach out to him! I contacted him asking to get coffee and when we did, things felt different. He was shocked that I had wanted to see him, but happy to see me. I mentioned that I missed him, and he said "no, things are different, let's not talk about the past."
We've been on a couple of dates since and have a few more planned. I didn't realize that this is what I wanted, but the universe truly gave me a do-over! I will keep you all posted on any major developments.
Until then, HAPPY MANIFESTING!
UPDATE MAY 2018
So I thought I'd give a little update to you all since there have been some very interesting developments!
I decided to let my boyfriend go, COMPLETELY. I prayed and prayed and prayed and asked the universe for guidance. Shortly afterwards, I mean within days, I met another man. It was very random, very abrupt, but this particular man has literally EVERY. SINGLE. THING. I've asked the universe for...some things I didn't even realize I wanted. I have completely let go of my ex-boyfriend and wish him nothing but the best, but this experience has taught me that the universe truly does know best and it is only when you let go of something and are not attached to it that the best outcome can manifest. Notice that I did not say "I got him back," but that the BEST OUTCOME OCCURRED! It may be hard to hear but sometimes the best outcome is one that we do not think we want, and is actually NOT being with that person, but our resistance and desire to control causes us to block the universe from doing its thing. Stop resisting, stop blocking and TRUST AND BELIEVE that God, the Universe, whatever Higher Power you believe in, is working on creating the absolute BEST for you! And just to remind you all, I pined after this man for EIGHT YEARS, truly thought he was the love of my life, NEVER imagined anyone else taking his place, never imagined feeling those feelings again, but not only was I able to get over it, but am so much happier today. I've truly learned that the Universe knows best and will deliver the absolute best to me because that's what I deserve! Thank you all for being there for me on this journey and supporting my learning and growth during this time! Happy manifesting!
Lots of love,
Also, though...with regards to that example you gave, I would note that you could not have been a vibrational match to the doubt of your friends unless you were practicing the doubt yourself. Other people's low vibrations should not be able to dissipate your energy if you are in complete alignment, because when you are in alignment you are unconditional. You can thrive in any environment. It seems that you are attributing the doubt you had to your friends' negativity, when really you said that growing up you were taught the belief that if you tell people about plans they will "fizzle out". That is just a belief, it's not a fundamental truth. You can decide it's true or untrue and you will be right depending on what you practice about it in thought.
You could shout your plans from the rooftops and if you are in full unconditional alignment they will not only still happen for you but it will be vibrationally impossible for you to even match with anyone who doubts them, and if you do, it will roll off your back like water just like any other contrast. If people laugh at you or think LOA doesn't work, that shouldn't matter to you in the slightest because you're on such a high flying disc that their opinions mean nothing.
I'm not saying there's no value in keeping things to yourself :) I totally get what you're saying. But it just seems like there is a lot of response to other people's vibrations in there and in LOA nothing comes out of the blue.
Perhaps subconsciously I was a little vulnerable, no one can escape that sometimes. But if I'd been fully aware that my subconscious belief could affect me I would not have told anyone, I really only thought of that AFTER it all went south but even growing up I thought it was really just a superstition. The fact stands that I was strong until people began checking on me. That made me question myself for whatever reason and then my vibration went down.
I don't totally agree that we cannot be influenced by others even when when are vibrating high. I learned when I was just 14 after reading a book about the powers of the mind that other people's negative vibrations could most definitely affect us unless we know how to protect ourselves but the advice given in that book was for face to face encounters, since my communications were online it didn't apply.
Many of us know how exhausted we can feel after being in the company of some people, and there's such a thing as "emotional vampires" too. We a re NOT machines, our vibrations can change from moment to moment for a variety of reasons, as menial as being hungry or tired. I'm afraid you're just repeating stuff that you heard or read that sounded true to you, but I know much too well that the wrong company, even when nothing much is said, can have a great effect on some of us.
FYI, I do not like A. Hicks, listened to a lot of her/his videos for a period of many months or a year. I kept doing it because a lot of things sounded good BUT at the same time she also said a lot of crap and she goes around talking and talking and saying nothing for the express purpose of confusing people. In the end, when she denied Jesus Christ's importance I remembered what I'd learned years ago that "channelled spirtis" are nothing but demons so I got away and didn't go back. I've never really been a follower anyway, nobody's perfect and sooner or later all teachers miss it on one point o another. So I prefer to form my own judgment mostly through experience after gathering knowledge from different sources. You can believe what you want but I'm glad I do not follow anyone blindly. In this world we have to be very discerning, big lies can be sandwiched between two truths but that doesn't make them another truth. But very ironically, a search I did just now about "not telling" brought up an A. Hicks video about that.
Anyway, you asked and I only gave my opinion, it's ok for you to disagree. You can go ahead and shout it from the rooftops if you want, maybe it'll work for you. But since there are teachers that feel differently, and as I said explained why, I prefer to play it safe even if it's hard to keep things to myself.
That's fair enough! I'm not suggesting that we are never influenced by other people, we constantly are, and that's okay - it has just been my interpretation of Law of Attraction - not exclusively through A. Hicks - that everything we experience is a match to our thoughts and beliefs. So if I create a magnificent reality I can say "I did that" and when I create a not-so-good reality I have to say "I did that too". Either way I am the creator of my experience. And my goal is to get to a place where I'm less and less of a match to "emotional vampires" - doesn't mean it never happens, just that I notice I'm happier the more unconditional I am. That is just my own belief. Yes Abraham definitely mentions the benefit of keeping things to yourself, which is great!
I get what you're saying and I never implied that I believe to be always vibrating high. In fact, that has been a struggle of mine. You're probably young so you have fewer decades of negative "programming" to overcome, I also suffered from depression and anxiety for decades and that keeps a person mostly in a negative state, yet I was able to attract quite a few good things into my life probably during periods when I was not feeling too bad, but other times I did it just out of pure faith. We often are tested by negative people or situations that come into our life, plus the LoA is not the only law in the universe and it is not limitless as some may think, it can be limited by other laws, at least it's what I've learned.
The fact that I came here shows that I'm not perfect at practicing the LoA but I have definitely learned some things that have helped me a lot. We all learn at our own pace. You are here too because you want to learn more, or need help staying motivated I suppose.
I only spoke about it with one friend, as he was actually the one who introduced me to the law of attraction and mentioned that he had attracted multiple exes back through using it. I only spoke with him when I needed inspiration though and tried not to dwell too much. I didn't tell most of my close friends because they would have thought I was crazy and because I personally feel that I'm sensitive to the opinions of my friends, so I would have let it get to me. I personally do not know what the LOA says about telling other people about your intentions, but it looks like some others had some insight, so I'm hoping that helped! :)
Thanks! :) All of this is helpful. Did you mention this has been your first real experience with LOA? That's very impressive, you seem incredibly well versed in it - bravo! You'll never want to go back to creating by default. :)
So let me actually tell you my LOA story - it's a little weird but I believe the universe was preparing me for something bigger than myself.
I had heard the term "LOA" thrown around by a couple of my friends. The first one had been using it to attract a lot of women and for career success and but also used it for some things that are downright immoral and evil (getting revenge on people, things like that). I mostly found it amusing but didn't take it too seriously. Then I had an old friend come into my life very abruptly and we fell back into our friendship. He began to talk to me about consciousness and being awakened and I thought he was a little off, but I didn't let it affect our friendship. He also had talked about the law of attraction to me but I didn't believe it. I then started dating my current boyfriend and this friend left my life, saying that he felt bad energy there and that I need to stay away from my boyfriend - which actually, my friend was not wrong, my boyfriend HAS put me through a lot, and I am actually battling internally now regarding whether or not I want to continue this relationship with him. But anyway, a couple of months into dating, I began to feel depressed and anxious and had been reading Oprah's book "What I Know For Sure" and then had heard Oprah knew about LOA. I was like what is this thing that everyone is talking about? I started to learn more about it, and then when my boyfriend and I broke up, I decided to actively use it to get him back and threw myself into literature around LOA. One thing about me is if I want to know something, I will do ALL the research I can about it. But now, connecting the dots looking back, I can see how I actually manifested an unhealthy relationship, and my breakup, so I knew I could fix things! I also see how the universe was preparing me for this work with LOA. Just wanted to share. And YES! I love knowing that I have the power to create whatever reality I want! :)
That's amazing! You definitely have a go-getter vibe! I love hearing people's stories, it's so funny how often they begin with "I never believed in it before".
One of my fave things about deliberate creation is that everything can be transformed. Whenever I'm conflicted about a situation I remember a teaching that really inspired me that reminds me "You take yourself with you wherever you go. So stay or go, it doesn't really matter, make a decision and line up with it and as you raise your vibration everything around you will have to rise up to meet you where you are - it is law."
I LOVE that because it makes our job as simple (but still hard sometimes!) as getting into alignment and then watching what happens. In that sense it's not even possible to NOT get what you want, whether it's this or something better! Everything shifts into place with your better feeling thoughts.
Thanks for sharing your story! So excited for this journey you're on.
Thank you! It's crazy but this journey has actually really turned me into a "go-getter." I used to be way more passive in life and just watched it "pass me by" until I learned that I have full control, which has been such a huge revelation! I used to think I have no control, and went to believing I have FULL control. I wish I could share this with everyone in my life and make them see it, but I know from my own experience that they have to believe it themselves too.
thank you ALL for being a part of this journey with me!
Personally, I wouldn't but it depends on your relationship and boyfriend and how you think he'll react. If you're asking from an LOA perspective, sending him love energy is a great idea and since this is your desire, he is already on his way, it shouldn't affect him. But if you feel inspired action to do so, then trust yourself and the universe! I do believe every circumstance is a little different. :)
And YAY! That's so great to hear! I am so excited for you! Keep on being positive!
This thing about talking to your friends about your goals... Well, my mother and grandmother have always taught me not to tell anyone about my goals until they come to fruition. They told me that what I do and/or want is no one else's business, and that not everyone has good intentions when it comes to you. Some of them may secretly hope you fail. And boy, were they right! And even now, on my journey about the LOA, I've read some articles that advised me NOT to talk to my friends or other relatives about my goals, since, even though their intentions may be good, not everyone thinks like you, and some of these people may have negative opinions, and, without you realizing this, you get influenced by their negative points of view, you come to a place where your vibrations are so low that you start doubting about your desire, you no longer feel like you can make it, like your desire is worth pursuing or trying to make it come true. Been there, done that. Even now, with my guy, I was down after the break-up, and I would always talk to my friends about the break-up and about how I wanted him back. Some of them were supportive, but some others just told me that he would never come back, to stop thinking of him because there are plenty of fish in the sea, that there are better men around, that he didn't want me any more, and that I should just be realistic and move on. This really killed my faith and my vibrations. I started crying a lot, thinking that there was no chance of me and him reconciling again. I would often contradict them by telling them what a great guy he is (he is, indeed), and that they knew nothing about our situation. And they compared my experience with theirs, saying that their exes didn't come back, but WTF? Every story is different, and just because their exes didn't come back, doesn't mean mine won't come back when the time is right. In fact, I attracted some exes in the past when I didn't think too much of them or of their return without even knowing about the LOA, but I didn't get back together with them, because I was the one who didn't want that at that point, but I will get together with this guy when he comes back (I think he will come some way or another). A little time ago, I decided to stop talking to my friends about my desire to attract my guy once again, and honestly, I feel better. I only talk about this with my mother and some people from this forum. In fact, one of the articles I mentioned above advised to talk about such things with someone who knows how LOA works. I will tell my friends about this only after me and my guy get together again.
And about the so-called Christians that Rackie mentioned... please! She is right. I think they are the most unfaithful people, maybe more unfaithful than ordinary people. They really are faith-killers. I cringe a lot when I hear someone say that it's not God's will to have what you desire or the person you desire. C'mon, as someone on the forum said on another thread (and this is my belief as well), God wants only what's best for you! If you have a desire, it's because God KNOWS that you can manifest it if you have faith and truly believe that it's going to happen, and then act as if you already have it. God gives you whatever you want, but you just have to help Him by being positive, having faith and believing with all your heart and soul that your desire is coming. All those things that God doesn't want you to have this and that are just bulls*it. God wants you to have everything you desire, so don't give up, and don't listen to anyone! As long as you know deep inside your heart that your desire is manifesting, then no need to worry or listen to others' opinions, especially if they are negative.
Have a good day! ^^