You CAN have anything you want, as long as your thoughts and feelings (your vibration) about what you want match your desire.
In the short time I've been on this site, I've seen a lot of postings from people who are asking the same question.
As wonderful as all our answers can be to this, or in fact any question here, the fact is that when it comes to Law of Attraction, the universe has only 1 language: vibration.
It doesn't matter what you are doing or think you're doing or why or how or where or how difficult or easy things are, the universe is always going to respond to the way you really feel about a situation.
But usually in their postings, people don't always say how they really feel, sometimes because in their sadness or pain, they cannot work out what it is, or are afraid to admit it or just don't want to for personal reasons.
But the way this whole thing works is: if you focus on something you want and feel good about it regularly, it will come to you in a way that pleases you.
Plain and simple.
When we are worried about something, the focusing is easy, but the feeling good part is a total struggle, because you can't worry about something and feel good about it at the same time; they have opposite vibrations.
So, in order to be helpful, people would say that you still have to find a way to feel good, because that is a very important part of the process. But when you think about your ex, you feel bad, so, you have to find a way of feeling good without him.
But the whole idea is that I want to be with him! I don't want to think about not being with him.
Some people get very angry and a bit violent when they read this kind of thing.
But really, no one is, or should be trying to take your dream away.
As you find thoughts that genuinely make you feel good, you will start to feel better; some people feel reluctant to do this, partly because it does not seem right to them that they should be feeling good, even when something they don't like is happening to them and partly because they worry that if they feel better, then it means that they don't really need to be in the relationship after all. However, the moments that you are feeling good are the best time to turn your thoughts to positively attracting your ex; thinking about the things you love about him, how wonderful the thought of being in a relationship with him feels, remembering the fun times. Now, it is easier to find thoughts like that and still feel good, because you improved your feelings first before you did it.
What does tend to happen though is that for a lot of people, as they get better at feeling good anyway, they start realising how much they were negatively thinking about themselves and things as they were in the relationship; this often makes them feel reluctant to go back as they believe it will only bring those feelings back. At this point, they start feeling that it is ok to want a perfect, divine relationship and they don't think they can really have that with their ex after everything that's happened, so they move on.
But you don't have to be one of those people; you can get to feeling really good about yourself and your relationship and still want to be with him and focus positively and attract a perfect, divine relationship with him.
The choice is always yours.
I wish you the best on your journey to the relationship you deserve.
Sounds like a contradiction, doesn't it?
But that is how it works...
Well, you can always have what you want, so the technical answer is "yes".
We are all attracted to people and things that are a vibrational match to what we want.
It would be truly odd for someone to feel completely in sync with someone else but not feel like being around them or at least have them in their life, wouldn't it?
So it would follow that if both of you are in sync with each other, you will be attracted to each other yes. And the universe will find a way of keeping you in each other's lives.
The reason an ex is an "ex" is because, at least when you separated, you were not in sync vibrationally. If, after you separate, you decide you want them back and you start the process of coming into alignment with yourself first, here's what will happen:
1. From your place of connection and alignment, it would feel very disconnected to you to want to be with someone who does not want to be with you.
2. Your connection will inspire you to think about relationships differently and you would start to appreciate that in order to be in relationship with him and still feel good, he will have to be vibrational match to you too; and you would not want it any other way. So it will no longer be one sided.
3. The better you really feel, the more the universe will bombard you with men who match the qualities you're looking for. You'll be spoilt for choice! This is what LoA does for a living. Expands everything.
So, as you can see, the better you feel, the better everything becomes and the better everything is. It's just not easy to see from a place of worry or fear.
My dear friend,
Words do not teach; only experience teaches.
As I said in my last post, if you are worrying about getting your ex back, your negative feelings won't allow you to access the thoughts and feelings you want; that is why I have explained about feeling good FIRST.
You want to believe that he is coming back; you want to know that everything is going to work out well, but you cannot have access to these feelings from a place of not feeling good.
There is no other way around it; trying to find a way to cheat the process without doing the work first is only going to take you round and round in circles asking the same question. And that will only frustrate you more.
The only way to know is to do.
I am delighted that it has helped!
Shembu has it spot on, and I speak from experience!
I did all the 'right' things that LOA teaches to get an ex back BEFORE I had reached the place of loving myself, and yes, I attracted my ex back to the point where he said the most amazing wonderful things, but ultimately it fell apart again, because I hadn't done the work on myself, I wasn't happy within myself, I wasn't attracting him back from a place of self confidence and happiness, it was ultimately desperation and need. Me and my ex have since been going around in circles, getting to the point of almost being back together, and then it all going wrong again. It's been completely draining!
Now I've chosen to let go of him, for a while, or maybe forever I dont know yet. But I honestly feel that all my strength has come back!! I feel great! I love myself more than I ever have in my life and, despite not having something I do want, I am genuinely the happiest I have ever been!
Now I look back at how I've been for the last few months and can see I hadn't done the work I needed to do on myself, it took having a real break from my ex and the situation for me to have enough breathing space to sort myself out. And now I can genuinely see that our vibrations don't match right now, unfortunately I feel his is lower than mine at the moment, which is why we aren't attracting one another. I do hope things will change, but I also am open to meeting someone else. I want the best for myself - as you should always for yourself - and if that means he and I reconnect, fantastic, but if not then someone better will come along!
You WILL reach this place eventually! And I read on here and hear all the time people saying that it's when they reach this place, of 'letting go' of the relationship, that things suddenly work out for the best.
Ask the universe for happiness and say that you want to be in a true love amazing relationship with your ideal guy - and say that you hope it is your husband, and then release it, get happy, work on yourself, spoil yourself. Put yourself back on the pedestal, make yourself your number one priority (as you always should be). And everything will work out perfectly! Think of what you look for in your ideal partner and try to become all of those things! Like attracts like, so if you become what you want, you'll attract it!
Get your self confidence and strength back and I guarantee he will feel the change in your energy. And if you two are meant to be, for each others greatest level of happiness, the energy change will bring him back, but if you aren't meant to be, you will reach the point where you are OK with that and can let it go.
Amazing post Shembu, literally the 3 points you state are exactly what has happened to me!
Thank you for the vote of confidence!
Of course all this is a little tricky to appreciate without experiencing it first.
More people need to know about this! :-)))