So I hope I won't make my story to long. My boyfriend broke up with me 3 months ago. We dated for a year and a bit.He had reason, he warned me a couple off times that I just should've stopped figthing. ( I was unhappy with myself and I couldn't help but Always being so negative to him even though I loved him to dead). He broke up with me a couple of times for some days and then came back hoping things woudl've changed, but they never did. He started to go on his way more and more, and that's the moment I realised what I was doing. But it was to late, he broke up with me because he couldn't just take it anymore. And I feel so mad at myself everyday for let him leave.I cried, begged, even went to his house ( oh god ) So, when he broke up I didn't talk for him for about a months, I thaught it would've been over by then, but it didn't! I felt more bad then I did the day he broke up with me. ( Oh yes, we had a really bad break up. Were his friend and our familly started to mind our bussiness) When I first texted him he said he was really happy and wanted to catch up. But he said that because off the time off he lost feelings for me because he was sure he made the right choice. I felt afwull, but even then I met him on a wednesday evening cause I missed him so much. I was so stupid for having sex with him. I think it ruined everything. Okay so three months later he said to me he wanted me out of his life because he found someone new. I was so devasted, really. And then I found the secret and I thaugt, okay fine. He doesn't want me, he wants that other person. Fine! he said he wanted me to leave him alone?! Okay that's what I'm going to do! He is going to come back anyway. Everybody comes back. I was very postive thinking ' he doesn't love that girl, he loves me.' So 5 days later... there he was again. We chatted a bit and then it all happend again. So nothing changed since then. I feel like I'm his 'sex partner' ( it isn't going to work out with that girl) I felt not good about it because I definitly wanted more. So I texted him it had to stop. He kept on texting , like 20 messages asking for an explanation I didn't wante to give. And asked if he could come over. After him almost begging to see me I agreed. He came over and I didn't wanted him to touch me. He constantly wanted to be sweet, he asked 10 times what was wrong. Always wanted to hug me. Because I was so tired of him asking me I said ' Okay fine! I had sex with someone else! I'm sorry.' ( which wasn't true but I just wanted him to actually go, it was already hard enough) I was actually suprised when he put his head on my shoulder and asked ' why did you do that?.' ' with who did you do that? please I want his name. He was quite for 10 minutes. till I felt to bad for him and then I addmited it was just not true. And oh yes. after that, we had sex again.( I know, not good) After that I didn't hear from him again, nothing. And I want him back, he was so loving and caring towards me. But I was not used to getting all these sweet attention that I didn't knew how to handle all of that. It will be very complicated to get him back, cause all his friends think very weird things about me now. our boths families were involved so it's a bit embaressing. But still, I just know. HE is my soulmate. No one else, and believe me I tried. I tried to talk to other guys, but that makes it worse. Is there anything I can do to change his mind?
It is not about changing his mind.
You really don't want him back the way he is, you want him back being how you want him.
And who can blame you?
But LOA is not about changing other people, it is about aligning with ourselves and we MIGHT influence others ( if they are attracted to that, at this time ) but for sure we will attract others that are a match.
Right now you are a match for him and what he is doing with you.
So you need to find a way to let go and focus on feeling good yourself!
You do not have to "rule him out", just decide who you are and how you want to feel.
To make it easier you can start by saying, I want to feeling loved appreciated, etc etc, by MYSELF and someone else, either
( His Name ) or someone even more amazing that will come along and surprise and delight me!
That's just an example, but you can not make him the focus of change.
Right now just find things and people to appreciate.
I have my own story to tell but for now I agree with Marcy, you have to focus on yourself and release him and let him go. Start using affirmations to confirm how great a person you are and you really are!!! For example say something like I am in a loving happy relationship with myself, the universe sees the act of “wanting” a thing pushes it away from you, since all thoughts are creative, and the thought of wanting a thing is a statement to the universe — a declaration of truth — that you do not now have it. And this is the experience that the universe then reproduces in your reality.
The moment you say “I want” something, the universe says “Indeed, you do!”, and gives you that precise experience — the experience of “wanting” it.
Focus on YOU and Focus on being happy and being the beautiful you that you really are!!!
NO you can only change your mind. Time to grow up and stop using Sex as a reason to be together.By the way there is no such thing as Soul mate that is your excuse for being unhappy. With approximately 2 billion plus men on this planet I would think there got to be at least a million or more who could make your day To find the right person for you YOU have to like yourself first before the right person shows up.The next man you meet could be the right one for you however in the state of mind you are in he will slip right by you while you are feeling sorry for yourself. sorry you needed to hear that. Len