SEBASTIAN, YOUR THREAD IS SO AWESOME!!!
How many times I have come here to have a good laugh!
Because it's there it is all about, after all. Laughing, having fun, being happy and joyful! :-)
SO THANK YOU FOR THAT!
Have a wonderful New Year 2011, and tons of good laughs! ;-)
A therapist in a mental health facility had about twenty patients he worked with. He usually prepared his patients to go out to be productive citizens in their communities. As part of the preparation for their discharges, he takes them out to the local zoo, pick nicks, ball games, and sometimes to the movies. He always addresses them as “Nuts”. For example, he would say to them during therapy: “Stand up, Nuts!” and they would all stand up. Any command or order he would issue he ended it with “Nuts”. One Monday he lined them up and told them: “Hey, we are going to see a Monday night football tonight, Nuts. Aren’t you all happy, Nuts?” They all shouted “Yes we are!.” He got them on the bus and drove them to the stadium. There, the quarterback threw a ball and the wild receiver caught it beautifully so he said to his patients “Get up and cheer, Nuts!”. They all got up and cheered. The game was going well so he kept saying “Get up and cheer, Nuts!” One time the quarterback threw the ball and there was an interception, so he said “Boo him, Nuts!” They all jumped up and booed him. The therapist wanted to use the bathroom so he said “I’m going to the men’s room so sit down and enjoy the game, Nuts!” After five minutes, a guy came around sell peanuts. The peanuts seller shouted “Peanuts!” All those patients got up their seats and whipped out their willies and started pissing on the spectators. The therapist got back and found a big chaos going on so he took them back to their mental health facility.
The old man approached a young stranger in the post office and asked, "Sir, would you address this postcard for me?" The man gladly did so, and then offered to write a short note for the old fellow. Finally the stranger asked, "Now, is there anything else I can do for you?" The old man thought a moment and said, "Yes, at the end could you add, Please excuse the sloppy handwriting."
A couple is sitting on the porch sipping wine. The wife says, "I love you."
The husband says, "Is that you or the wine talking?"
The wife replies, "It's me, talking to the wine
2 potatoes are standing on a street corner, how can you tell which one is the prostitute potato?
The one that says I DA HO