hi PI Family
I have so much experience of having my EX back since last year this time, and for 1 whole year of practicing, i know LOA always worked!!!!!! And I also realized why i just made myself in an "on and off" relationship, because i think
no matter how bad we are to each other, we will finally be together in the end and marry each other.
then i find out my inner society doesn't allow my belief, because my society tells me
i should choose that partner and live happy ever after in that relationship.
so when it conflicts, i just had possibly 40 times make up/break up relationship.. Now i understand it's all because of my own reflections!
Because i really had this belief since my BF and I started from the beginning, i suddenly realized today how it influenced us!!!
I was on my process of having my EX back, i experienced a lot of his "final" decisions, and not really pretty words, and he blocked me all over the place , phoned me, yelled at me not to contact him!
But I never gave up. I can already control what he said will enter my ear and brain, when what he said wasn't what i want to hear, I would immediately clear the memory and take nothing happened.
I have been in the process of ZH's post and many other "Getting EX Back post", and for this all time, i almost read everything about the topic, and listened to Abraham's video everyday!
SO once again, LOA worked on me!!! :) My bf contacted me last Friday, and he was very very very persistent to build something strong with me, but in his words, that is friendship.
I of course do not only want friendship, but friendship is very important , as in the past he didn't take me as a friend, not even introduce me to his life, and that hurt me a lot during that time! So my inner heart always desired him to take me as his best friend, because i know a good relationship needs 2 persons to be good friends as well, but we were never friends not even when i needed help, i never thought of him in the 1st place, because we had some kind of wall between us, and many topics we didn't share.
So since last Friday, he kept wishing to grow strong with me, and explained what he has done wrong in the past, apologized to me, and said he could have done more.. I think he is getting really sincere, but when i asked him whether he wanted a relationship with me, he said it's just for friendship. He said he would not invest in a long distance relationship.
With all what I have learned from LOA, i know there are no conditions. So in my eyes, long distance relationship is just a so-called condition. But I will not be limited to that.
NOW, my question is, compared to what i want from him ( a love relationship based on strong friendship of course), he just wanted friendship now,
does it mean my application of LOA worked correctly, that what i finally want is on its way, just will first come the friendship
OR it merely means friendship is already the final outcome???
How to understand this?? Please help and give some advice. :)
As I said in the other thread, LoA is always working whether the outcome is wanted or unwanted. Unfortunately, I could not tell you whether or not friendship is the final outcome because LoA is not the same as seeing into the future and telling fortunes. Vibrations ebb and flow and are not concrete destinies, so it comes down to whether or not you vibrationally match within this moment to his idea of an ideal relationship. In such a case, I wouldn't try to fit your vibration to what he wants but focus on your own.
I'd like to clarify something about conditions. It's true that a long distance relationship can be considered a condition, but more often in LoA speak when conditions are brought up they are referring to the idea of holding yourself away from feeling good because you don't have what you want yet. So as an example that would be like saying that you wont feel good or satisfied until you get your ex back. That is a limiting belief, because the only reason why you think you want something is so you can feel better once you have it. LoA teachings want you to feel good/better now regardless of whether or not you get what you want.
To be unconditionally happy is the goal. Not to get stuff but because it feels so good to feel good. And when you feel good, your vibration raises and you will begin to attract better and better things. That might involve him, it might not, it might be something even better than him that you can't even fathom right now.
So I would say that it does seem a bit bizarre to me that you want a romantic relationship with someone who you were never close enough to that you could consider them as a friend. It does seem you have chosen someone not because they already fit your vision of an ideal relationship but because you want them to fit into it. Starting again as friends, whether it leads to a relationship or not, sounds like a good way to clarify your feelings on what and who you really want as a partner.
Why do I want this?
Why this person specifically?
Can I feel the way I want to feel without being in a relationship with this person?
What ways can I feel the way I want to feel that are independent of a relationship with this person?
I am not telling you that you will never or can't iget back together with your ex, but I do want you to consider your own vibrational power. We're all in this because we want to feel good.
Thank you WinterHoof,
typing so long text and i appreciate a lot! I agree with you, my vibrational power is the the key point. I don't really understand your text which is blow,
so it comes down to whether or not you vibrationally match within this moment to his idea of an ideal relationship.
i don't know if i should match this moment to his idea of friendship. If i match him, yes we would be in one vibration vortex, but seriously i don't want to merely pause on a friendship level.
And here, your text
It's true that a long distance relationship can be considered a condition, but more often in LoA speak when conditions are brought up they are referring to the idea of holding yourself away from feeling good
In my eyes, being happy should not be based on any other conditions. so with those conditions or without, we can always be happy. So I apply this to being together with my ex. no matter what the condition is, with it or without it, long distance or not a long distance, we can be together as a couple.
Do I understand it correct?? I really hope an answer long distance is just long distance, whether it is bad or not depends on my own reflection and understanding, and reality only depends on my own reflection but not the condition.
Hopefully I can clarify this in a way that you'll be able to better understand.
What I am referring to in the first quote is that we can only attract what we are a vibrational match to, and we are always changing and vibrationally shifting as we discover what we do and do not want. In order for you to get into a romantic relationship with your ex again, you would have to match him on his level of what he considers an ideal romantic relationship. What I am saying in the sentence after that quote is that you shouldn't fuss over it and instead just focus on your own vibration.
Regarding the second quote, the long distance part is not what I am actually referring to. What I am saying is that whether you get back with him or not is a condition you are using to hold yourself away from feeling good or better. It is not about the physical conditions but the vibrational ones you are setting. To unconditionally feel good regardless of whether or not he comes back romantically.
Whether or not long distance relationships are conditions is not the real issue. It's using your relationship status as the reason on whether or not you can feel good that is the condition.
You want him as a boyfriend? You'll get that! Just trust d process & enjoy d ride!
Love you too dear! Never stop dreaming! Some more quotes :D:
It really depends upon his "inner being," and it WANTS to COOPERATE with what you think/believe/feel for the two of you!
thanks for reply, but could you tell what supports your words, which I might not have noticed. ))
Many using LOA to get EX back and succeeded, but if your words made sense, it shall all depend on another one's inner being..