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My husband is nearing transition. Please send love his way. UPDATE: My love has transitioned

Dear friends,

I have written so much about transitioning over the years. I have had this beautiful view of what it is and how un scary it is and natural and it was all so believable in my mind and in my heart. Like I know this is natural and beautiful and nothing to fear and yet now that it is happening i am reminded of how final death is. I am scared to death of the moment I realize he has gone. My best friend, my husband for 30 years, the father of our beautiful children. Its unbearable. I apologize for all the cheery inspiring BS i ever posted here lol.

No i dont mean that. I just feel so powerless and so afraid that i wont be the pillar of strength my kids need me to be. I am terrified of not finding the words. I need to get back to a place of feeling positive and accepting his transition guys. I am running on fear right now. I could really use a hug and some reassurance.

Most of all im afraid for Mike. That he will feel alone in his journey or unloved or any discomfort at all. I want to save him still from his pain. He deserves peace. Thank you everyone for being here for us.

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Awee I’m so sorry to hear of your husband’s passing. Sending big hugs your way! <3 I was lying in bed the other night and was thinking what it’s like on the other side, and how it feels to die. I began to feel VERY relaxed....a feeling I haven’t felt before and I wasn’t scared...and then it was like a non physical being put thoughts into my head saying....I will be there with you to guide you crossing over....the feeling is so good you aren’t bothered about anything. I don’t know if you have ever experienced a spirit putting their thoughts into your head but it makes you think their thoughts. I know your husband would have been so peaceful when he was crossing and would have had a lot of spirits helping and guiding him to cross. I hope you and your family feel better, and remember, your husband is always with you in non physical form. Wishing you and your family the best. <3
Emmeline, That is beautiful, thank you so much. I love you all.

My sweet friend, I'm sending you so so so much love and strength. We are all here for you. Xxx I don't have any words of wisdom but I do have love and a shoulder to lean on xx

You know, this is so odd .... this "medium" we call "the web". It's rather archaic really, no different than sending a message in a bottle and dropping it in the sea. Like writing hand written letters on paper too. Come to think of it .... it's really no different even face to face....as "close" is never ever close enough ...... for in Love ..... I'm talking real and true LOVE here , the only LOVE there is ...... LOVE ITSELF ..... LOVE's Indivisibility .... LOVE 's Wholeness/Allness, One and All .  LOVE LOVE's none-other-than LOVE'S OWN/ONLY "SELF" .... LOVE.   LOVE's  face ..... is the very LOVE .... LOVE faces

LOVE  Is The Only EXISTENCE 

LOVE   SEES    LOVE 

LOVE    HEARS     LOVE 

LOVE   IDENTIFIES    LOVE 

LOVE   KNOWS    LOVE 

FOR   LOVE    IS     LOVE 

LOVE   IS    SELF 

SELF   IS     LOVE 

                                       (          (        (     (     (     S M I L E     )    )    )        )            )   

FP I know today/yesterday (global time) was the service to celebrate Mike.  I hope it was all you wanted, needed and hoped for it to be. 

Hopefully right now you are wrapped up in the love and support of your family, each propping each other up in some way but I just wanted to send you love and let you know your wider community is also embracing you.  

My experience with grief is that it is the most physical of emotions.  It sits upon you, like a physical weight or pressure whether you give it your attention or not.  So be kind and gentle with yourself.  Especially after a period of physical exhaustion that can accompany palliative care giving.  Remember, there is no right or wrong in how you grieve. It is all allowed. There is no more appropriate emotion you SHOULD be having.  Offer no resistance to your feelings.  Remember, you do not need to go through your life placing happy stickers on things to cover up your fuel gauge. 

But know this.   

You will keep finding your way forward.  On days where you may feel like you're drowning, you will break through the surface and breathe deeply again.  You will feel the sun upon your face and know that feeling within your very being that everything is ok.


There is much love for you here and especially amongst the old PI'ers, even if they no longer visit much.  And some of them are already on the other side of the energetic barrier, no doubt sending their love and messages of how good the view is from there.  Awesome will of course be leading the back.  


Sending so much love to you and yours. 

Thank you so much DDB! The truth is I’ve had anticipatory grief for so long that I’m ready to release the feeling. It’s been sitting as you described on my chest for more than a year. I’m not exaggerating at all. It was in fact when I decided I could take no more and told the universe I was ready to let go and be happy that he passed. Seeing him in such pain was dreadful. But becoming such beautiful friends partners was so beautiful. Yes Helene! What a comforting thought to imagine her spirit guiding us. I thank you so much. I’m going to be ok. Today I started writing my new story. I’m allowing myself to put me first. I’m letting our kids be strong for me except our youngest- we’re doing it together. The sun was out and springs upon us. Love you!

Oh FP I'm so glad to hear that you too have found peace with Mike's passing and were able to release him and celebrate him in such a loving way.  I'm sure it was no coincidence that he transitioned when you were ready for him to.  

It's been an incredible journey the two of you have been on, and as difficult as it has been, it seems like there have been plenty of incredible gifts to cherish along the way.  

I'm so looking forward to hearing all about your new story.  It's going to be incredible! 

keep shining. 

So happy for your positive feelings & your attitude!! You're showing an incredible wisdom & strength!!

If some bad moments come (i hope not) accept them, a perfect process as you know is to allow yourself to feel everything you need to feel. True joy is waiting for you!! 

L'immagine può contenere: testo

I also want to tell you the day was perfect! Everything was truly beautiful, he would have loved it. I was very happy with everything. Also you’re such a wonderful friend. I love you xxoo

Deep Peace to Mike, to you Cheryl, to your family and all who knew him. 

Thank you Ross! I’ve come a long way since we last spoke. Thank you for your friendship, love &wisdom!!

Sending you lots of love dear. 

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