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I made that mistake of engaging with the Universe it can be discouraging. I kept attracting really freaky things through the negative energy I was giving off and it gradually got worse to the point that I started attracting some freaky things. I don't think youtube self-help videos work at this point because I would have to be a higher vibrational match for what they are encouraging me to do. I have not gotten along with the source in a while, in fact I'm angry at it. Discovering and mastering this law after doing some irreparable damage is also hard. At the moment depression looms over me and I have convinced myself that I am evil because of what I have attracted in my life. This is why I joined these forums because I was having an emergency after attracting some really messed up stuff.

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You are treating "the Universe" as something that is outside of yourself, that does things to you that you do not like.

The truth is that you are "the Universe." You are inseparable from it. When you fight against it, you fight against yourself. 

The one who is bringing "freaky things" into your life is you; they are not being imposed upon you by any source other than yourself, and your negative attitudes.

You seem to be in a lot of anguish, and feeling very hopeless, for which I am sorry. At the same time, you are the one keeping yourself in this black pit, by dwelling on past mistakes you insist are irreparable, and deciding that you are evil. Can you see how this line of thinking is not helpful? It will only perpetuate your negative mental state, and thus keep attracting negative things into your life. You do not get the things you want; you get the things you focus upon. If you want relief, yet continue to place all of your attention on your regrets, how miserable you are, and how the Universe is acting against you, there will be no relief. There cannot be relief, in that situation, for you cannot create relief by focusing on your despair. 

You do not need to fix all of your problems and become a little sunbeam for positivity right now. It is okay to not feel  great about your situation. However, if you are going to consciously harness the Law of Attraction and make it work for you, it is important to make ongoing attempts to at least feel better, to the extent that you can. Pursue actions and ways of thinking that will give you relief, even if you cannot yet manage to feel happy. If there is anything you can do that will improve your circumstances even a little, do it. Clean your room. Do the laundry. Step away from whatever media you consume that reinforces your negative view of yourself and the world, and go outside. As long as it does not harm you or anyone else. It does not matter what it is, only that it gives you a feeling of relief.  

If you are self-medicating with alcohol or drugs, stop. Get help for it, if you need to. If you are, like most depressed people, sleeping poorly and at erratic times and eating a bad diet, it will help tremendously to impose a regular sleep schedule on yourself and eat three regular meals a day that are not composed of garbage. 

Most important, however, is to train your focus away from everything you believe is wrong and irreparable about yourself and your life. Start looking for the things that work, and that you can feel some positivity about. They may seem insignificant at first, but if they make you feel even a little bit better by noticing and thinking about them, that is enough. Continue to look for those things, and to reach for better feelings. In time, it will become a habit, and you will not only start to consistently feel better, but feel good. Your vibration will gradually rise, and your experience of the world will start to improve accordingly.   

The bad news is that "the Universe" will not magically lift you out of the black pit you are in just because you believe in the Law of Attraction. The good news, however, is that you can gradually lift yourself out by working with the principles of the Law of Attraction, starting with, "You don't get what you want; you get what you focus on." Change your focus, and everything else in your reality will follow. 

This is a great post, and you should reference it Jman. 

You are what you think you are. So you better choose your thoughts and mantras wisely from now on. Do you choose to say to yourself, "I am good and only good can come to me!" Like Louise Hay taught or do you say and think and thus believe and become it's opposite? It is always up to you. And Abraham says, "A belief is just a thought you keep thinking."

Yeah I attracted some really freaky shit from my negativity. Some of which I wonder if it hurt any spirits or angels.

Cause of attracting really freaky synchronicity. 

After being negative enough to attract some of the worst crap imaginable I noticed some really messed up synchronicity, omens, coincidences that seemed to indicate that I was attracting really bad trouble. I know the Universe only responds to the orders you give it but its still a creepy scenario.

I gotta be honest sometimes i feel the universe through meditation and deep thought and it gives me answers i dont want to hear.

Its not anything but a feeling. I seek answers from God not through direct communication but by meditating and getting answers from energy, feeling, sensations etc. And almost all of the time I walk away with answers that are completely bad, dissatisfying. God/Source/Universe is telling me i made my bed and now i gotta sleep in it. I go through hours of intense meditation to get the universe to give me answers but the answers  are usually the opposite of what I need. 

Maybe your right. My fear of this issue naturally stems from the creepy synchronicity that re-enforced my fear.

Jman..

how about this..

Let’s not discuss why this belief of yours is false. Like Greysen suggested - what you resist persists . May be, at this moment, if you feel like it’s too much work to figure out the truth , then how about you let it be? 

The main question is what do you want your life to be like.. And what makes you happy..

as long as you focus on achieving your desires that bring you joy, this belief of yours shouldn’t bother you. 

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