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I made that mistake of engaging with the Universe it can be discouraging. I kept attracting really freaky things through the negative energy I was giving off and it gradually got worse to the point that I started attracting some freaky things. I don't think youtube self-help videos work at this point because I would have to be a higher vibrational match for what they are encouraging me to do. I have not gotten along with the source in a while, in fact I'm angry at it. Discovering and mastering this law after doing some irreparable damage is also hard. At the moment depression looms over me and I have convinced myself that I am evil because of what I have attracted in my life. This is why I joined these forums because I was having an emergency after attracting some really messed up stuff.

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Actually some do desire that kind of power, but thats separate from your post, just wanted to alert you that the world isn't as you would otherwise believe.

Likewise, negative synchronicity isn't because of actions you have done, but rather your thoughts and beliefs you have used to create your life as it is.  The good news is that if you can create life as it is now, you can easily create something better if you are desiring to do so - but no one is going to force you to.  Your life is your own and what you choose to do with it is your business.  

Well I keep asking you why you believe you are able to destroy spirits - but so far you haven't been able to offer me any proof whatsoever.  You see that which is spirit is indestructible.  Just as your spirit is.  It always was and will always be.  Simply because you had negative thoughts doesn't mean you were able to destroy anything other than yourself.  You see our thoughts impact our body and every negative thought we have is in essence a limitation which we place on our bodies.

So your asking me what kind of books or advice I've been using Graysen. Well the answer is none. I recently discovered the Law and perhaps its time that I seek advice from a writer, author, speaker etc.

Yes, because it really helps to know where you are starting from because there are a variety of different sources and they are all correct and accurate, but different authors stress different elements and so its a question that to better help you - we ask.  

It may be better to start off instead reading a book on it and working through the book prior to actually speaking to an author because it will enable you to move quicker with the author if you understand more what you are doing, and some authors require it.  Some don't mind you and if you are set on doing it that way - go ahead.  

What author do you recommend  for fears of negative synchronicity. Or trying to get rid of self-imposed blocks when trying to manifest?

Well again, is your focus to change things or look at what you are really scared of?  If its the latter you might be better off considering a therapy of some sort like CBT for example, as thats really good for treating anxiety etc.  However if its law of attraction materials, then getting a book like Michael Loiser's law of attraction is really good, and its nice short and sweet and practical too.  

I'm not sure whether there are any books on "fears of negative synchronicity" but there may be, but you would also get benefit from reading general law of attraction books in that they will show you tools/processes for changing anything and everything you desire.  So that includes this.

I do actually participate in CBT. But in the process of attracting negative things I attracted very negative coincidences and synchronicities. Not to sound like a broken record but that is the source to daily pain. I cant  even breathe correctly because of stress levels.

You could try sampling a few books online and see which ones resonate with you more. 

I am sure there is a thread somewhere on this forum with a long list of recommended books. 

No you have chosen to focus on negativity and that focus is attracting more of it to you as a result. 

You are treating "the Universe" as something that is outside of yourself, that does things to you that you do not like.

The truth is that you are "the Universe." You are inseparable from it. When you fight against it, you fight against yourself. 

The one who is bringing "freaky things" into your life is you; they are not being imposed upon you by any source other than yourself, and your negative attitudes.

You seem to be in a lot of anguish, and feeling very hopeless, for which I am sorry. At the same time, you are the one keeping yourself in this black pit, by dwelling on past mistakes you insist are irreparable, and deciding that you are evil. Can you see how this line of thinking is not helpful? It will only perpetuate your negative mental state, and thus keep attracting negative things into your life. You do not get the things you want; you get the things you focus upon. If you want relief, yet continue to place all of your attention on your regrets, how miserable you are, and how the Universe is acting against you, there will be no relief. There cannot be relief, in that situation, for you cannot create relief by focusing on your despair. 

You do not need to fix all of your problems and become a little sunbeam for positivity right now. It is okay to not feel  great about your situation. However, if you are going to consciously harness the Law of Attraction and make it work for you, it is important to make ongoing attempts to at least feel better, to the extent that you can. Pursue actions and ways of thinking that will give you relief, even if you cannot yet manage to feel happy. If there is anything you can do that will improve your circumstances even a little, do it. Clean your room. Do the laundry. Step away from whatever media you consume that reinforces your negative view of yourself and the world, and go outside. As long as it does not harm you or anyone else. It does not matter what it is, only that it gives you a feeling of relief.  

If you are self-medicating with alcohol or drugs, stop. Get help for it, if you need to. If you are, like most depressed people, sleeping poorly and at erratic times and eating a bad diet, it will help tremendously to impose a regular sleep schedule on yourself and eat three regular meals a day that are not composed of garbage. 

Most important, however, is to train your focus away from everything you believe is wrong and irreparable about yourself and your life. Start looking for the things that work, and that you can feel some positivity about. They may seem insignificant at first, but if they make you feel even a little bit better by noticing and thinking about them, that is enough. Continue to look for those things, and to reach for better feelings. In time, it will become a habit, and you will not only start to consistently feel better, but feel good. Your vibration will gradually rise, and your experience of the world will start to improve accordingly.   

The bad news is that "the Universe" will not magically lift you out of the black pit you are in just because you believe in the Law of Attraction. The good news, however, is that you can gradually lift yourself out by working with the principles of the Law of Attraction, starting with, "You don't get what you want; you get what you focus on." Change your focus, and everything else in your reality will follow. 

This is a great post, and you should reference it Jman. 

You are what you think you are. So you better choose your thoughts and mantras wisely from now on. Do you choose to say to yourself, "I am good and only good can come to me!" Like Louise Hay taught or do you say and think and thus believe and become it's opposite? It is always up to you. And Abraham says, "A belief is just a thought you keep thinking."

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