Honestly. I'm in mid-move. And I did my best to calm myself last night. I kept telling myself things go fine for me. And now I have good experiences where I move. But I arrived today and a primal problem rared it's ugly head immediately.
I want to live in Los Angeles, and I tried to have hope that the air quality would be only bad WAY IN NEAR LA itself. The only place I found to go was into Indio. And within 1/2 hour of showing up and walking 5 blocks I realized the air quality was very bad for me, because I have allergic asthma. Then I looked up the numbers and THEY WERE BAD. I am 70ish miles out of LA and THE AIR IS STILL VERY BAD!
I am crushed. I feel like it means going in any further would be a waste of time and dangerous for my breathing issues.
I cannot change and solve this in a matter of a few hours. I my back up was mean to be Stockton. But I don't have funds to travel, and the major carrier is shifting people for so much more than the train* but the train WON"T run a matching schedule to help me go to Stockton and have a place to stay when I get there and not be stuck all night outside at least one night in an area of 300,000 people.
I need the universe to get me through tonight, to let me stay where I had originally planned and be able to manage my belongings. *There is a big issue with that, so if I refuse to possibly THROW away all off my property, I may not be able to stay.(don't ask).
My family isn't responding. I just warned my mom I may have to sleep outside for a night or two here to sort things out. This is dangerous I know. But this is what I'm facing.
I need solutions right now.
I have found no other place I can stay tonight locally that is a shelter.
And I'm completely broke, have no way to repair things. I just want to cry and fall apart like I did all morning yesterday.
I LITERALLY GOT EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED THEN, "Be careful what you ask for" HAPPENED AGAIN>
I am sorry to see that you don’t feel so well. All I can say is hang in there, the best days of your life are yet to come. We all face setbacks at different times in our life. It does seem hard to tap into joy and abundance from a place of fear and lack. Just do the best you can. You are infinitely powerful. You are infinitely loved. You have so much potential.