Its been 3 months since breakup, nearly going onto 4. I am missing him, however I want to adopt another way instead of missing. I do want us back together, or a better version. However instead of missing, is it best to say "Have"?
Rather than focus on this relationship or lack - its better instead to find things to focus on that make you feel good in any shape or form - it can be anything, listening to music, dance, having a bubble bath for example - anything that raises your vibration. You see at the moment your focus is on the lack of relationship - and whilst you are saying you "want" (which is what you are getting from the universe as the word means "to lack") if you instead focus on feeling the best that you can be right now, in this present moment and then work on things to get feeling even more good - so much so that you feel great with or without a relationship - as usually thats when the other person starts noticing you moreso and desiring you. Then you can decide whether you want that relationship again or something completely different and more fufilling.
Thankyou Graysen i appreciate. I notice i focus on me and have good days. Then i switch to very intense thought patterns of him, missing the lack as you mention.
It can seem to be difficult in the beginning, because you are exercising new muscles. So just be patient with yourself, and when you notice your focus is on him or the relationship switch to something else. I often find gratitude is an easy one, because no matter what the situation - usually there are a ton of things to be grateful about from the earth beneath your shoes, to the oxygen you breath and the warmth of the building you are in etc. That helps shift the focus back to yourself and back to the present moment in which you are the source of power. It seems difficult at first, but the more you do it the more easier it becomes.
Yes, I exercised with my soul sister this morning on the beach, the beauty of sky and the waves, I felt a lot of presence. I felt a lot of gratitude and yet come home for breakfast and my mind wanders to him :/ This is how strong our connection is, my other ex I let go so easily and I was with him for 13 years. My heart is strongly connected to this one.
When you spot your mind wandering, you are in complete power and you can either allow that to stay or focus on something else - it really is that simple at all times. You may have a strong connection - but this shows you that you are loving and capable of love and if you can create that - you can create many more that are more suited to you who will cherish and honour you for who you are and who you be.
Thanks Graysen, honestly I cannot seem to comprehend another person, I have been told there is another? I just feel I resonate highly with my ex on many levels except where he is currently which I know wont last.
It seems difficult granted, but you can do anything you choose to. Now you may resonate with your ex, but rather than see that as the only possibility why not start affirming that other possibilities show up and ones the treat you with respect and dignity and honour? Why not also start looking at why that relationship didn't work for you - because otherwise it wouldn't have ended. Then you can take steps to examine whethery ou really want to recreate it again with him or someone else, or whether you desire to create something even better.
Another suggestion may be that rather than focus on relationships at this point in time you focus on having fun and joy in your life (whether in a relationship or not). So you start inviting that into your life more and you start enjoying life. Then whether your ex shows up or not doesn't matter.
I ask ......
Who am I to deny God ? The Allness, EverPresence, the ISness and BEINGness of God, the Truth of God that God IS and cannot be denied ?
I know it isn't totally the same, but I am going through something similar with missing my spirit dog whom I love dearly. Also at the nearly the 4 month mark! (he crossed over)
It's so hard not to feel them missing when their physical presence is gone. Just to share my thoughts on this. I personally feel like it's understandable to allow yourself to feel all the feelings of grief. Although we are connected on many levels, it's only natural that when the physical connection is absent you will almost detox from them in a sense. I had serious anxiety and panic attacks. Touch, looking in the eyes of a loved one all bring out deep feelings in our physical body that create a beautiful experience.
I find as I allow myself to feel all the painful memories/feelings to surface the positive side naturally becomes more available to me. For me personally I found this takes time and can't be rushed.
I focus on feeling love/gratitude/joy for him and all the memories that make me smile as well as new experiences I would like to have. All the things I love about him. How lucky I am to have had his friendship.
I go for walks and talk to him just like he is there with me and say all that I want to say. I do all that I can to heal and deepen my spiritual connection to him which I feel will be so beneficial when we meet again.
The most important connection you have to him is still available to you.
The better alternative to me is said in many ways. Imagination creates reality. I'm an avid reader of The Secret stories and read some cute ideas...such as one girl who just pretended her and her love were on separate vacations while she focused on herself. (even though he had dumped her)
I do however feel it's so important to forget the past so there isn't a repeat.
Do you read the living stories? Thousands on reuniting with an ex
Thank you so much Satori for sharing. I agree to leave the past and renew. I am working on myself too, I must :)
I agree that that imagination helps create our reality and I too enjoy reading the Secret stories.
I am so sorry to hear with the loss of your furbaby, it is not easy. We lost our cat in March to kidney failure, such a shock. They are with us always in our hearts xoxox
Thank you for the kind words over my doggy love.. I lost my twin flame years ago so I can relate as well. I was reading some old notes I had made and thought of you in hopes that it could help you shift to feelings of love and gratitude for him, yourself, the past and memories.
"I thought good of myself. I loved myself. I Ioved my life. It happened the exact way I had imagined for months. I wrote the love story I wanted and said 'thank you for my beautiful love story and healing my relationship'.
If I could have my love again in my life after the terrible words he told me anyone can have everything in their life'
I also always remind myself of the law of one. That we are distinct, but not separate. I know from my experience with my TF that they will feel your growth and love no matter where they are.
These words describe it so well
You are connected to everything and every one. You are already connected what you want. To the degree that you truly comprehend and internalise this Truth, you will be able to become the master of your mind and the director of your life.
Thank you Satori, sorry to not reply sooner, just saw your reply :)
People like you inspire me, so strong after losing twin, or a partner. I am putting on my superwoman suit to cover my sadness, and at times I cry and get down. Hearinng inspirational stories when people have said they have focussed on themselves, got busy did there thing and the ex comes back.
I am listening to self love meditation and doing anything to keep my head above water.