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OK, I will try and keep this short.  Since joining LOA my main thing in life was to get my ex back.  I had loved him for so long and hadn't seen him for over three years and I knew he had a long term partner.  So through speaking to the wonderful people on LOA and really taking on board their advice, within the last year I finally learnt how to let go and how to have that 'don't care any more ' attitude.  I learnt to live within my vortex and really was having a great time in there.  I no longer cared that I couldn't have him but I still 'played' at being with him and imagining what it would be like one day to have a partner that I loved again (whether it be him or not).  Also during that time I secretly wished for a friend who lived nearby to do local things with.  I have a lot of friends but the closest I live to any of them is 20 miles.  We meet at weekends to see shows, meals etc but I wanted someone nearby to go walking, gym, watch movies etc with.  So I also tried to manifest this.


Well, then the strangest thing happened. I started a new job six months ago.  It is 26 miles away (but only half an hour on the train or car).  As soon as I started, I really hit it off with one of the girls who sits beside me.  We had everything in common and, lo and behold, she lives a mile away from me.  We go out to lunch once a week and she wants us to go walking, drinks, gym etc in our home town.  Now this is all good you are all saying.  It was until she told me her partner's name..............and it is my ex who I love.   GOD, how did this happen???  I got what I wanted but also what I didn't want either!  The thing is, she is so nice, I really want her to be my friend, we laugh all the time but I now cannot live in my vortex.  I get so jealous when she tells me what she and John are up to.  She has never asked me if I know John and I have never said a thing.  Also, I don't believe she has mentioned me to him as if she had, I don't think she would be friends with me.  I am now so confused.  What if she invites me to her house and he is there?


So now I am thinking, the LOA does give you what you want but with a twist.  Or is it the Universe's way of bringing John back into my life in some way?  The thing is if the latter was true and John fell for me again, I could not hurt my new mate as I really like her. 


What a strange world we live in.  Can anybody advise me on how to now deal with this in a mature, positive way nd also how to get back into my cosy vortex??  Thanks in anticipation.  K x

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Was really hoping for a reponse on this.  Anybody?

No, it's the same guy.  She drives his car (I know his car and his reg) and also lives at the same address as him.  He has an unusual surname so it is deff him.  Really awkward situation now.  Although I always did secretly wonder what she looked like and what she was like.  So that thought has now manifested itself big time.  I never ever had a desire to meet her but there you go.  Not sure how to handle it when she does ask if I know him or whenever/if ever she wants me to come hers.  Also I want to get back into my vortex and cant because I feel asif I am having an affair with her man and I feel so guilty.  What to do...........

I think you made things harder for yourself by not telling your friend that you and John used to date. If I were that girl and I found out you had kept that from me, I would think you did that for a reason. And that reason seems pretty obvious to me: you still haven't got over him. I know you say you 'let him go' and have an 'I don't care anymore' attitude, but evidently you haven't got over him if you still feel jealous about their relationship.

Personally, I would tell this woman pretty soon that you used to be in a relationship with John. I would also stop visualising John to get into the vortex. It is perfectly easy to get into the vortex and feel love and romance without picturing an actual living person. I think this turn of events is your wake up call, and it's time for you to finally move on. :-)

Love xxx

You have been given a delicious secret to keep. Don't tell her, and don't tell him. 


That secret, will give you power, unless you use it destructively.  


You can use this experience to feel like and expect that a new man, is now on his way towards you.  The universe is testing you to see if you are really ready.  Be open, and seize the opportunity when the new guy shows himself.  Don't just wait for him to tell you want to hear. 


Interview him, in that special way women can when they are interested in a new man.  

Hi Kirstie,

i would say you should be glad that you can see the manifestations happening..which means you are very good at applying the secret. You are on the right track. I would suggest that imagine all three of you to be happy and in a perfect relationship and leave the rest to the universe. I know you can do this :)

Wow it is like something from a movie. I feel for you. My best advice is try to visualise your soulmate, someone that has all the qualities you want in a partner. Just get your attention away from John. You really do not want to get in a mess like that. Since you like this girl very much, you should tell her something along the lines of "you know this John guy is he the one that does this and that etc" if she says yes, then that is your opportunity to say "no way i can't believe it! We go way back and i dated him". But you have to also withdraw from making it personal and that you have moved on. He is not someone you want as a partner, it will cause a loss of friendship. 

Thanks everyone, I actually agree with all of you but Sparky, you are right, I do still love John, I can't just turn it off but why would the universe give me a wake up call?  It is supposed to give you what you want.  OK, I might not get John but why not bring me a man first so I can be so over John whenever his partner came into my life.  It is very confusing because I have been trying to manifest a relationship for two years now and OK, i was picturing my ex but still kept my options open.  I have decided that if my friend asks me if I know John I am going to be honest with her and try my best not to show any jealousy but it is tough,


Steve, I like what you say as well because I do love having the secret.  I do feel good that she doesnt know but also a bit guilty.  And anyway, part of me feels she does know and assumes I am over him.

Harmony, I love your advice as I am amazed that I have manifested this, albeit not quite in the way I wanted it.

Ray, you are right, it is like something out of a movie but I do think this is happening for a reason.  Not sure if it is for me to get a reality check or whether it is for me to have John back in my life as a friend.  And I know if that happens I need to be very good at acting and keep my feelings to myself.  The things I have been visualising a soul mate for two years with no result.  OK I used John as the main part because it was easy to do that but why not give me the partner first then bring the mate, that way there would be no jealousy involved?  So I am thinking this is the universe's way of bringing John back into my life in some way.  Nothing is set in stone so just because she is with him now doesn't mean she will always be with him.  she does complain about him a lot and I know she stays overnight in town so she doesn't have to go home to him.  They do argue a lot I know that for sure.  Anyway, I will take all your advices and get back into my vortex with somebody else and just enjoy every dayy.  Whatever will be will be.

I forgot to say, I do have a male friend in my life (he is married though) and we are like best mates.  We travel to work every day together and have done for six years.  We laugh all the time but there are no feelings involved and nothing has ever happened.  Nor do I want it to but I told my new friend that he was my boyfriend (I didn't mention he was married or tell her he was my mate).  I just told her I had a partner and his name was Joe.  That was to give her the impression I had no interest in her man (in case she does know I am his ex). 

Kirstie, I'm a bit confused. Sometimes you say you have been 'visualising your soulmate for two years,' but other times you say you have been visualising John while 'keeping your options open.' Which is it? Because if you're still in love with John and you can't completely let go of him, then it's really no surprise that another guy (your soulmate) hasn't come along. When you're still in love with someone, that's a pretty big road block, and I think visualising John is not helping you get over him. 

I'm a bit concerned about you lying to your new friend about having a boyfriend. Do you not want this woman to be a bigger part of your life? Aren't you worried she'll want to meet Joe some day? i just feel honesty is the best policy, and you could make this situation so much easier by telling her the truth (but maybe leaving out the fact you still love her partner).

You mention that she and John apparently have relationship troubles. If you and this woman are so similar, maybe this is a sign that John was and will never be the one for you. Just a thought.



Hi Sparky, I'm confused myself so no wonder you are!!  Yes I have been trying to manifest John back into my life in some way, whether it be as friends or back together as we were but at the same time accepting it might not happen and hoping if not then someone else will.  I thought that was what LOA is all about.  I haven't been refusing offers in the hope that John will appear, there just haven't been any offers to refuse!  I was with john for over ten years so it is hard to let go of someone you loved for 10 years.  It's only been three years since I saw him.  Yeah I shouldn't have lied to my new mate (karen) but I worded it so I wasn't lying.  She asked if I had a man in my life and I told her yes his name was JOe.  I didn't tell her I was living with him or anything, I just said he had been in my life for 7 years which is true.  Yes I would like to Karen to be a bigger part of my life and yes she will want to meet Joe one day.  That won't be a problem as Joe is readily available to meet. But I know what you are saying.  Yes, Karen and I are similar in that we share the same interests and such but we are still two different people. 

I think the best thing is for me to wait till she mentions John and asks if I know him then I can tell her the truth.  I don't want to be the one to bring it up first.  I don't want her thinking i befreinded her just to get near him (which wasn't the case as I didn't know who she was until I did the math later on).  I will leave it up to the good old Universe and wait and see what happens.  She need never find out I still have feelings for him and who is to say he still might have feelings for me and this is the universe's way of bringing us back together (through someone else).  Their relationship could end any day (these things happen) and he could contact me.  If this happened then I would tell her and ask her what she thought about me being with him again.  But if somebody else comes into my life then that will be it resolved.  I will keep you updated!!

This is a very strange turn of events Kirstie. And since neither you or any of us know the reason why they are happening it is anyone's guess what your next course of action should be. I see a temptation for you to think this is the universe bringing him back into your life but try to stay grounded in neutrality with your feelings. I don't wish to see your heart break further. Just try your best to maintain your "moving on to better men" mentality and use your intuition as guidance for what you should do. Only the universe knows why this is happening and only the universe can show you the best course of action to take. Thinking you know why things are happening could bias your actions so do try to keep an open mind, and an open heart and things will be revealed to you in their perfect time. I wish you all the best in your journey :)

Thank you Tee Jay.  I must admit my instincts as soon as I realised who she was were that the Universe was doing this in order to bring John back into my life as one of my constant messages to the Universe was 'I would like John back in my life in some way, either as a friend or more than a friend'.  I really would love to meet someone else or have John back, either would be great but it is not happening.  I think I really need to just play the game as best I can, by being a good friend to Karen without telling her anything and then if she asks then I tell her the truth and say I am John's ex but I have to make out (and I will probably have to lie to do this) that I have no feelings left for him.  If she invites me to her house and he is there then I have to just put on a big act.  I still think though if the Universe really wanted me to not to be with him ever again, move on and meet someone else, then the someone else would have been brought in first and then I would have been over him.  So it is very confusing but I will take each day as it comes, play cool and see what happens.  Thanks again.  K

Kirstie, i have been through something similar. 6 years ago, i was in love with a guy, and i used to visualize him with me, while still hoping to meet the love of my life. Then last year my ex came into my life and at the same time, there was a guy in my life. But the guy was only a friend whom i like a lot, and i had to choose between the 2 of them. I stopped talkin to my ex, but then at the same time, i think it was too late, the guy i liked had changed his thoughts abt me, and he kept me in the friend zone despite us having a prospect of being in relationship. 

It was not long until i realised that i was and still am in love with my guy friend. Things have changed, and i wish at that time i could really put a cross on my ex, and welcome that new guy in my life. But i was so stubborn and wanting to give my ex a chance, hoping that we'd be happy n all, bt it's all b*llsh*t. Now i feel my guy friend is the one ive been waiting for, but i think he is in love with some1 else and is intending to marry her. Again, i lost love. And what im feeling right now is horrible. 

From experience, let go of John, u guys broke up i dunt knw for what reason, bt im pretty sure it's for the best. I hope u meet the love of your life soon :) 


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