Why do we cling on to people or things that we know are hurtful and bad for us? Why do we take for granted the things and people that are ultimately good for us in the end? Why is it so hard to let go of toxic relationships, while we know that there are good people readily waiting to be our friends?
I think we are addicted to the pain. Have you read Eckhart Tolle's "A New Earth"? I think it will answer a lot of your questions as they have to do with the "pain body" (collection of our negative/self-perpetuating thought processes).
It's funny because even as you realize you are addicted to the pain, it's still difficult to let it go. Maybe on some level we believe that we deserve self-destruction.
I haven't read the book yet, so I don't know what context Eckhart meant it in, but I definitely disagree with it in this context.
Yes, sometimes pain in necessary to grow and learn from but I wouldn't say so necessary that it becomes an addiction to one.
Life is beautiful. Love is beautiful. Life is love and love is life. Why would one want to choose otherwise? Things are lovely and easy, it is us that deliberately complicates things. We need to get back to basics and get to a level where we are able to nip things in the bud when we see them starting to not go well. A simple adjustment of the mind and attitude gets us there quickly.
Yes, that's the point, it's not necessary. No addictions are necessary.
And I was re-phrasing Eckhart Tolle. I highly recommend that book to anyone.
Yes, I've heard it's a must read :)
Will get to it eventually after my loooong list of 'must reads'.
I was going to say the same thing. MUST READ the book!
Maybe they think that this is as good as it's going to get and it's better to have something than nothing? Maybe fear has such a strong hold over them?
Elf Princess, this happens when we are not in control. It's PRECISELY and EXACTLY how LoA works!
We go toward something that pushes us away. A lover that breaks up with us and shows no interest in us- what do we do? Run after them even more.
Think about how you have manifested things in the past. Did it come when you were anxious and desperate for them or did it come easier and quicker when you 'pushed' it away and out of your every moment's thoughts? LoA works in the way that we manifest better when we are able to detach ourselves from the outcome.
In the above examples that you have mentioned- you are on the receiving end. When we make ourselves the most important person in our individual lives, we understand that we need to love ourselves first in order to be able to be loved. We need to appreciate and respect ourselves first, in order for this to be reciprocated to us by others.
We must be in the state to approve, know, expect and accept only love, light, happiness and goodness and that is what will come to us. When we are willing to bend a bit or accept disrespect or drop our standards, that is when we get people treating us badly like you have mentioned.
You teach people how to treat you by the way you treat yourself.
(*runs away to tweet quote that)
All the best dear!
This is great advice
Its that damn R word again!
Choosing happiness is no different than choosing a different flavour soda from the vending machine. It's simply a choice to pick better feeling things, thoughts, experiences than what we had before. If you bought an orange soda and hated it you would not go back to the vending machine and buy the same drink again would you? But you would make this choice easily because this is something very trivial and therefore the world cannot come crashing down around your ears if you choose the wrong soda. When it comes to life experiences and our happiness this is always a big deal. We heap so much pressure on needing to be happy, needing to change in one swoop what is making us unhappy for the exact opposite. We try to flick the switch from unhappy to happy without putting in the steps needed to get from one place to another.
It's like Abraham Hicks says, if you try to think a thought that is so out of line with your current thinking you cannot get on the merry-go-round of feeling better. You get thrown off in the bushes. Instead you have to find a feeling that is better than what you were thinking and feeling before. It's not a case of turning your entire thinking and life on its head but building momentum to be able to think and feel these wonderful opposites to what you used to think and feel more often.
It's re-learning that you are in control of your thinking and your life. Choose a slightly better thought than the last one, then do it again and again. Take it in baby steps and it won't feel like such a huge mountain to climb!
Love and Light
www.aravelleangel.com ~ Ask An Angel
LoA based oracle card readings
In another thread, my friend Alice In Wonderland spoke of something she'd discovered regarding the idea that some people get addicted to certain levels of Cortisol in their systems. Cortisol being produced by the adrenal glands when stress is experienced.
So, like some folks are "adrenaline junkies", always needing that "rush" -- living at the extreme edge -- others are Cortisol junkies, having become addicted to various kinds of personal drama and the resulting stress that produces it.
There's also the idea that we will always -- ALWAYS -- move in the direction we believe will be better for us than the available alternatives, and move away from that which we believe will not be good for us . . . the result often being that what we believed was going to be so good turned out pretty sour, due to beliefs based on erroneous premises.
Therefore I suggest doing what I so often do -- put on the psychic scuba gear and go deep-soul diving, to seek and find the beliefs you harbor that do not serve you, thus beginning an exploration that can be as frightening as it is enlightening, but one you MUST TAKE if you intend to ever "defeat your demons" -- that is, convert your self-sabotaging, self-destructive beliefs to more self-serving, self-constructive energies :-)