A Dancer's Diary by Amanda O'Boyle

A dancer's diary

by Amanda O'Boyle on Sunday, May 29, 2011 at 1:33am

I don’t dance for attention; I dance to attend the mis-unattended parts of my body that have long been suppressed by the impressions of my own ideals.

 

I’m not dancing for the polite, excuse me, don’t step on my toes ballerina swirl, I am dancing to discover the lost meaning of my spirit.

 

The distance between my heart, my body, and my mind, how far they have lost touch in the static sounds of radio blasted songs, enamel painted magazines, high heels and I’m to tight skirt to understand that this is just the only thing that seems to fit right into what you want, not I.

 

I’m not dancing to be featured in the light of I’m a good dancer, I’m dancing to be featured in a story called My life, where my bones become the possibilities for devotion, where my body becomes the carrier of my soul, where I am the distance, the journey, and the destination all in this one moment, this one breathe, this one step..into flowing.

 

I am dancing to re-define the lost language of my own bible.

 

I am dancing to breathe the suffocation of my heart.

 

I am dancing to throw my desires into the pulse of my feet where the ground I walk on, becomes my connection to the center of my core leading me, because I am tired of being cordless. I’m tired of having no dial tone, in this body, in this lifeline that connects me to you that connects me, to me.

I want to ring, so loud in the center of my being that I move into the chaotic chorus of a thousand wild horses, a hundred hurricanes, 300 volcano’s, and 200 lifetimes, stumping, jumping, and extracting the mirrors out of me, so I can learn to let go. To let go.

 

So I can learn to surrender.

 

In the moment of meeting two ends and always new beginnings, I am dancing. I am dancing for the thirst in my soul…in my being, down to my very bones, I am dancing. I am dancing to reveal myself.

 

I am dancing for the misunderstood connection to my body, to my blood,  to my bones, for I will dance a thousand rhythms until I understand the connection to my body, to my blood, to my bones.

 

I will dance a thousand rhythms so I may love this body like a new born child birthing from it’s mother womb.

I will re-birth this body,  and I will hold it in the arms of my spirit and sink it into the womb of my earth and cradle it’s ever layer.

 

So I can learn to love, unconditionally again.

<3Amanda

 

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Replies

  • I thought you might! =)
    • wow!..so beautiful..immediatly connects wid d soul..:)
  • Your welcome....I thought so too. The author is as beautiful as the art. She happens to be a good friend=) However, I had no idea she could write like this...she keeps revealing more and more of her beauty every day...such a blessing to share!  

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