This group is for those who are trying to mend broken relationships, and for those who are able to contribute constructively and supportively to members reaching out for help. Please, no judging or scolding. Judgemental posts will be removed.

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  • Hey guys?  Can I get some advice please.  My long distance bf has gone cold and is withdrawn and I don't know what approach to use.  Been reading so many things I am not quite sure anymore how to approach this. 

  • I am going thru the worst breakup ive ever had!!!! and desperately need someone to talk to...!!! ive got no one, my family refuses to talk about him, my children (teenage daughters) don't know how to help, and I don't have any female friends... just one, who isn'[t a friend really... just a "surface" friend.... We broke up april 30th... ( I broke up with him)... but really had not stopped talking... until recently... I know he loves me, and omg this is such a long story... I just need a friend... someone who knows what im going thru...please anyone out there... I need a shoulder to cry on... strength to go on, and the courage to either move on, or get him back..!!! I am 48 years old, he is 50... we met 4 years ago, and this was the most emotionally intense relationship for both of us... very electrically charged...very emotionally charged, boardering on obsession with each other... and im falling apart now!!!!!!! I cant breathe!!!

  • I just wrote an article about the best way of getting your ex back:

    The Quickest Way To Get Your Ex Back Is By Moving On

  • I moved my article to Your Tango

    Is He Emotionally Unavailable Or Is He just Not That Into You?

  • Overwhelm is created from the same fear that pushes people away.  When we can get so honest with ourselves that we take full responsibility for what we are creating, we can then be open to new possibilities.  The ego has many strategies and it's not by resisting or ignoring them that we can get the clarity we need to move forward. We can let the old negative patterns go once we see they don't serve us and that they are really grievances we are holding on to.  We are entitled to miracles. "Let miracles replace all grievances."  A Course in Miracles

  • I understand what you say, but I had gotten used to being around her and now I really don't know what to do with my time. I just need something to keep my mind occupied

  • James, what I keep telling myself about things or relationships I desire is to just be easy.  When we are in a relaxed and not anxious state of mind, we then allow those desired things to come more easily.  I believe "The Secret" forgot to tell us to let go of any anticipation for results.  Even with you telling yourself you are working to manifest out of love, your energy and emotions are probably sending a different signal to the Universe.  My advice is to distract yourself with hobbies, other people/relationships, exercise, etc. until you can re-visit this topic in a more neutral state.  When I adopted this mindset, things really started to flow in more easily. 

  • The thing is, she is very independant, very strong and does not easily fall in love. That is what is hard for me to understand. She has had no interest in anyone else until suddenly, there it was.


  • Hello James,

    I understand your situation and what you are going through. Somehow i feel the universe is telling you to move on because she doesnt seem right for you. Not that shes meant for you. It could be possible shes meant for you, but you seem strong. You tried to end it and she kept coming back, but the moment she meets and falls in love with someone, shes ready to be out of the picture. To me that seems that she isnt really a girl who is in love, she is afraid of being alone. I know that sounds harsh, but you seem like a very strong guy who has his head on his shoulders. You should be with someone who makes you feel good about yourself and you shouldnt have to feel like you are bending over backwards to make someone happy. Ive been in your situation where i felt that my insecurities got thebest of me. I drove my ex away with that and i wanted him to come back so bad. But when imet someone else, i felt that i was happier and i felt so free when i didnt fear losing him. So i guess you have to ask yourself what you really want before you try to get her back. The universe will grant you whatever you ask for:). If you ask for her back, then your asking the universe for a similar type of woman and asking for the same situation again:). Think again. Write down the qualities you liked about her and ask the universe to give you a girl like that and i promise you willl see that! Good luck! 

  • I am writing this to tell of my story and to see if there is anyone who can help me figure out just where I am in this.

    A year ago, I became involved with a lady whom I had known for about a year or so. I had secretly loved her from the beginning, but had not approached the subject, because of an age difference  (20 years) and I was also under the impression that she was out of my league, so to speak.

    When we became involved, everything just fell into place so easily that both of us said we felt as if we belong together. But, after a couple of months, my insecurity started to get in the way. I did everything I could to try to make her happier and happier, telling myself that I was doing it out of love ( I do truly love her with all my heart) but I realize that it was all out of fear. I feared losing her, so much that, well, you can guess what happened.

    But, she still wanted me in her life. She would contact me often, and then things would seem to be getting back to where they were, only to be pushed away again. This went on for a while, and about 4 months ago, I was struck suddenly with the knowledge that I would have to seperate from her completely before things would ever get better. I didn't want to do this. Again, fear, I know.

    Shortly after that, By some strange twist of fate, lol, I came upon a dvd copy of The Secret. And it all made such sense to me. I searched Law of Attraction websites looking for answers, trying to avoid what I knew had to happen. At last, I resolved that I couldn't stand the heartache any longer and tried to break it off with her. It lasted about a week. And she was contacting me. We kept up this dance for several more weeks and then, suddenly she broke it off with me completely. She said that she had fallen for another man, and that she could not be friends or anything with me anymore.

    As painful as this is, I can't help but feel that this is the Universe's way of moving this thing along and that we will eventually end up together again. Does this make sense to anyone? And what do I do now? I try to get on with my life, try not to think about her, but it seems impossible. I have discovered that My desire is now motivated purely from love, and not fear. But I don't know what to do in the meantime. Can someone advise?      Thanks,


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I decided to start a new chapter in my life.  I have been practicing LOA the wrong way and my love is now engaged.  I do not want to boring you with all the details; I am trying to forget the past.I have decided to start practicing detachment and start a new life without him; I am ready.  If he comes back fine and if not, it is fine too.  I am tired of being alone and sad.  I have tried to stay positive and I was able to do it until I decided to check his page where he announced his…

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We would fight a lot and now we broke up

Hi guys... Me boyfirend and i were in a relationship of 2.5 years , when he broke up eith me a month ago.I must tell u that we used to fight a lot, be it anybodys mistake. We were always breakinf up and patching up but i dont know, this time it seems kinda permanent..I m currently using loa to get him back, but my concern is wether we will stop fighting like maniacs or not? Because it's imp to be happy in a relationship.And also, around 6 months ago when we broke up one more time, he came back…

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I love her and she loved me a lot...but not together anymore

Right then... mine has been a 2 and half yrs long distance relationship.we did meet though.....things were quite good until recently...had a lil fight den afta abt 20 days of that she said its not gonna work and its a breakup...i persuaded did everything i cud but of no use....I tried getting her frnds to persuade her ...things den got really worse becoz she hated ppl specially her frnds knowing personal details of her... she blocked me everywhere and said she hates me etc.She also said she…

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