Hey everyone. I just lost the love of my life who was also my best friend for multiple reasons. I want to mend the relation. if anyone knows how to, I would greatly appreciate it. here's what happened...

he is my best friend since 2010 and i have loved him ever since. I am gay, btw. we stay in different cities and he is in his final school year and has very strict parents (like the dursley's were to harry potter) and right now we can barely talk, that too on sms. we only talk on like sundays for a few minutes. this may he came to visit me in my city where I stay alone and we were so happy together. we even got physical... almost everyday. he said he loved me and will always love me.

then he got back to his home, a very orthodox town and i got insecure and i started fighting with him daily. i got in a very negative phase. a month after his return he told me he no longer loves me romantically. he said that it happened 2-3 weeks after he got back and he loves me as a friend but nothing more. he even said he was straight (after doing it around 20 times with me.) when i press him on the subject he says he never loved me and only did and said all those things to make me happy.

I can bet my life on the fact that he did indeed love me. i could see it in his eyes and they way he was with me. so i don't know what happened but I have three reasons... a combination of which, I feel is the real reason.

1. he is scared or in denial of his sexuality. it is still not acceptable here to be bisexual.

2. he once loved a girl. they never got to date as, just when they first kissed, a few days later she died. he still loves her. and whenever he tries to move on, he feels like it's cheating on her. he says he doesn't want any other relationship or love in his life. he was 12 when she dies and is 19 now.

3. i kept fighting for no reasons and he hated it. 

he says he still wants to be with me... live with me forever but just as friends.

I want to help him get over his fears, move on and want to bring him back with my positivity. please help. I am really miserable by what happened.

thank you.

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  • thank you for replying. but do you feel it'z possible that if you really love someone, you will get that person? I mean the reason I feel he is the one for me is because when he wasn't in my life, i wanted love. i wanted my lover to be my best friend. i tried to manifest a relationship in which me partner would also be my best friend. and he came into my life. so i know the universe has brought him to me...

  • Give him time and space let him come to you let it be his idea. He will appreciate your respect for his feelings. In the meantime have thoughts of appreciation for him not thoughts of missing him. You get what you want and what you don't want you get what you focus on. So if you can't think of him without missing him find something else to think about. Do not let yourself have negative thoughts about your relationship. He wants someone who gets him who understands him. Be that person by allowing him to be himself and figure it out on his own no pressure.
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