Focusing hard Vs. letting go

Hey there! This is my first post on this wonderful forum. I am fairly new to LOA and have been working on attracting back my boyfriend/or someone better. The ex boyfriend post has been a brilliant resource, but I have a question which is more general to all things.In my experience, things have manifested best when i have asked and then completely forgotten about them. However, i am so emotionally invested in my boyfriend returning, it is difficult to fully let go of him and only focus on myself, when focusing on myself and my dream life includes him. Similarly I am attracting a cat to me (well on the way to getting one) - but again its such an obsessive thought that perhaps i am not 'allowing' as best I can.Has anyone had any experiences with things coming to them easier when they 'let go' of their desire (after all, the order has been made - shouldn't worry about it not turning up), or when they were obsessive about visualising and doing the loa processes.Thank you for all your inspired words in advance! Have a wonderful saturday!!p.s. In my reality theo is my healthy, happy, clean, enthusiastic, energetic, beautiful, loving and caring boyfriend, life partner, best friend, soul mate, husband and father of my children, and I am his healthy, happy, clean, sexy, loving, understanding, helpful, loving and passionate girlfriend, life partner, best friend, soul mate, wife and mother of his children. RAY AND THEO FOREVER!!! :)

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    • Thankyou soooo much Patra. I have to dash to meditation now but I will have a good and enlightening read through when I get back. I am so appreciative that you took the time to send me all of these wonderful quotes. Just skimming I know that they will make me feel good!

      Thankyou and Ill get back to you once I have read them!

      Much love
  • Thanks for all the great Abe quotes!!!
  • The interesting thing for me is that, in my experience, I have had it work both ways.

    Two examples:

    Before I met my husband I had decided that I was ready for a committed relationship again. I did a lot of work on myself to prepare for this and I did a lot of envisioning what it was I was going to have in a partner, and physically prepared my space for him. So, there was a lot of focus there. Within about 2 months of getting serious about this I met my future husband.

    On the other extreme, the other morning I was reading Dyer's book on the Power of Intention and he had an example about getting money to come to you .. I forget the exact situation but it was something about a check in the mail. Now I had no reason to believe that I was due a check but I thought I'd experiment. I held the idea of a check coming in the mail silently in my mind. Then I let it go and really forget about it until that afternoon when the mailman showed up with a check.

    Just a little while ago my neighbor came over to me a bit embarrassed because she'd gotten a piece of my mail this week and opened it, thinking it was hers. She gave it to me. It was another check.

    So, wow, one would maybe conclude that *not thinking about it* or *not investing too much desire into it* - or maybe not worrying about it - works better! But, I don't know. I think there are some things in life that are SO important they may be worth the extra effort and waiting, and other things are just fun icing on the cake.
    • Congratulations on your success!I too have experienced a little bit of both - but i think its difficult sometimes when thinking on a specific person, especially someone you already have had a relationship with, becuase that person already has a strong emotional charge attached. Detachment and focus I think (thanks to Patras amazing collection above) are both important - but you have to know when to use them. If you start focusing when you're feeling even just a little bit of lack - there comes the lack! SO im making an effort to focus only when I know im feeling great - you know when you have those moments where the world just lights up! But if im feeling a little hormonal ;), then I avoid any thoughts of him, becuase I know they'll turn bad. I'll keep you up to date on the progress! ...and while im slowing baking that cake of lurve...i will divulge in a wee bit of icing yes!:))

  • I really do!!! Im starting to understand how to modify my practise according to my mood - and its just wonderfully helpful! Interestingly after making a conscious effort to let go when I was feeling low - my boyfriend turned up on saturday - very odd...he parked outside my house with his friends whilst they were waiting for a bus (no logical reason for that), and they sat in the car for about 1-2 hours (i was having a birthday party for my flatmate at the time)...then he left his car there. very odd. but whatever it means - i am very encouraged - because i was asking for him to come to me, and he did, even if in a very odd way! KEEP ON KEEPIN ON!!!
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