Question about the "Lover's come to me" affirmation

"Lover's come to me, now"

 

When I first said this and believed it would happen, i worried a little about the term "lover."  Seems to me to have the connotation of "sex partner." I tried to convince myself that the word "lover" was all-encompassing, meaning relationships of all types as well as sex.  Well, I did get a "sex partner" lickity split.  But it was no ongoing thing. 

 

Now I kept saying the affirmation and someone who used to be a "friend with benefits" has contacted me.  I don't know if he just wants one thing or not.  He can't expect me to be the same person I was 8 years ago, can he?

 

A few weeks ago I had one of those dreams where I'm talking to someone, and the someone told me that I already know the person that I'm gonna end up with.  I wonder if this guy is it, but he bought up the sexual encounter's we had so many years ago.

 

I usually cut things off with people before they even get started and it's kept me alone for so long...but i don't want this guy thinking I'm gonna be easy.  I'm so nervous but internally, it feels like I Should go out with him.

 

Advice?

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Replies

  • Got it!! Make's total sense, of course! ; D


    Thank you
  • Be careful what you wish for! It sounds like you had some unclear thoughts in your head to begin with. My advice? Get very very clear in your mind about how you want this relationship to FEEL to you. Add images to the feeling until they make you smile and feel good inside. Keep sending love to those images and feelings!

    Cos if you feel nervous, and worried that he thinks you're gonna be "easy" guess what you're going to attract?

    Go the route I've suggested. Don't fight the worried thoughts when they come up - that just fuels them. Just keep sending love to the good images/feelings and that is like shining a spotlight in the darkness. All the darkness, by definition, cannot be there when you're shining the light! Got it?

    Have a good and lovely life!
    Trevor.
  • LOL! okay, breathing smoothly now...Yes, I am getting what I want, then the old movie starts up. So cleaning up my vibration sounds like a good step.

    I'll be hanging on to the feeling of the earth moving and heavens opening and being crystal clear as easily and as often as I possibly can....
    • "eternal, unforgiving present"

      admiring the clarity of that thought. beating the drum for a moment to set point it in dominant intention...to remember the eternal ever shifting present. to mind my shifting moment to moment. life really does break down to a "zen exercise" of the mind and emotions when i really start to pay attention. and that's got a promise that makes life interesting when i factor in that i can feel how i want to feel. i'd focus on feeling at rest in the perimeter of the emotional context that the relationship must manifest so long as that's the only thing i am putting on the table in my own vibration willingly, the rest is scrapped and pivoted from and diffused and anything but focused upon. or mabye i'd want find an easy focus in just being surprised and delighted by this man and what he is wanting to forge with me now?

      i have no clue what to do about the vibration around this man. would love to hear how it went if the emotions are fantastic and ease leaning and you come out of the experience feeling refreshed and blessed and eager for more of what you now have!
    • Hi DS!

      I may not go out with this guy after all. He's given me a few signs that he only wants one thing. I'd rather not be bothered.

      *sigh*

      I'm attracting "lovers" left and right. Only problem is I have now faced the fact that I want more...
    • I sure wish i knew what the difference was...I just want one thing too...and the social context of the relationship and the feelings of the relationship when that one thing is in between thinging are all just the context of that thinging. He doesn't want the feeling of what-comes-between-the-moments-of-thinging? i call those moments foreplay....since appreciating another "primes them for the sexual experience" (abraham). and quite frankly...i'm a one track minder about that thing AND SLEEP! once i've exercised my type a personality only enough to keep life moving and frisky. i mean honestly, if you are healthy and creatively expressing, what else is there but laughing, eating and cleaning and beautifying and ...that thing?

      beats me what's going on in this world of perfect for me and the rest is unwanted or becoming more with me....but contemplating your circumstances reminded me of something that i've been feeling, and somewhere in there i hope there was some forward leaning. i'm leaning towards knowing that the feeling of the relationship is something that is important to me, and that feeling for the feeling or at least things that don't contradict it is my only item on my to do list regarding that topic. amen.

      oh...and...you feel better after this conversation! i can tell! thanks for the chance to see that, nice support you got from your peers :)
    • I DO feel better. LOL. I really feel so good when I interact with people on this site!

      The only problem with thinging with this particular guy is we know a lot of the same people (via that popular social networking site and we all went to High School together) and okay maybe I wanted a certain old friend of mine to catch wind of me being in a new relationship. and besides, I don't know if he would go around talking about how proficient I am at thinging (he's already brought it up in one of our convos.)

      and maybe it's pride, cause if he had some game, some finesse, some class, we could thing it up!!

      what do ya think?
    • oh...no clue. but it got me to thinking about thinging.

      unwrapping the package of being in the arms of a man that is my treasure and delight and floating in his current as long as we aren't talking. toyota jumping ("oh o oh what a feeling; toyota!") about that feeling i'm unwrapping

      he's unwrapping the feeling of enjoying being delighted in. the man can do no wrong and he's got an agenda of ease and pleasure. actually, i have no idea what he's delighting in, but he's delighted. and he's delightful. and he's here and i'm so glad that he is.

      ho hum. another day at the ranch and life is good. going hunting in the kitchen, what would i feed him, how many ways could i tempt him since he feels like paying attention? how many ways does it take to wear out a man that size's appetite for pleasure and make him fall asleep while thinking something like....'as soon as i can think, i'll say something nice"....zzzzzzzzz.....

      what? were we talking about something? night! he just put me to bed. life is good and i want to be fresh to spend another day anticipating, remembering or just being with him. good lord, we might do that thing again ;) just wondering if we will should keep my focus focused on something vortex related :)

      lol. "lovers" are cheap thrills that i find rather expensive in out of the vortex emotions. i'd rather have a daydream instead, bc if i'm picky about what i daydream about, i can tailor pick the feeling of the kiss that comes to me on the wind. and come to me it will. it must, it is law and i've nothing better to do than hit that vibration just the way i'm going to want to actually experience it in the flesh. not a thing more attractive to my focus than that in this world, although i really like dinner and nice views and raising my kids and fun projects and my home being my friend and....

      that's what i think. no clue what you should do or think or feel, but that's how i like to feel. and i seldom really SAFELY (in the vortex or leaning towards it?) focus on how i want to feel about that kind of thing unless i'm bumping around in "public" conversation. that's one of the things i like about this place...it's not local, so you don't have to be so private, but you don't have to stay home completely alone...which makes being home alone quite nice in the long run until the other person there is a really really nice fit. amen! (and meanwhile, if you do anything embarrassing or painful, deny it bc those that love you don't want to know lol)
    • LOL. smh. I like what you said about lover's being cheap thrills with out of vortex emotions.

      Of course I'm out. I guess...

      I get jealous and can't share. won't share.

      cause when I imagine how I want to feel, it's...all consuming, fireworks, rockets, waterfalls, POWERful emotions and IT MUST be mutual.

      spent 10 years giving all that good thinging to someone and pleasing someone while he actively pursued other relationships cause I imagined him to be mine. Very painful.

      SMH. guess we'll just have to wait and see...
    • i'd work on finding another way to look back at that. that p word ....maybe you could term it "clarifying"...you know very clearly that you are into a grown up guy that values himself and his effect in the lives of others and wants to make that effect a good one. a really really good one and he knows what he's doing when it comes to maintaining his emotions, his relationships and his own goals. and meanwhile, for me, who am i going to be next to him? maybe there are ways that i can improve my tendency to focus in the meantime so that when he comes i will be a stable mate for him that holds her own in the lives that we live, and he is just one of the delights that this world keeps me interested and pleased with bc i DO know how to maintain my OWN vibration regarding him and all things relevant to me. and prepaving my experience with him is perfect practice if life prompts me to focus upon this desire that i do hold. let the one that is willing and nimble in fousing show himself to me and declare his intentions and invite me to agree with him that this is a good thing...let him find his own way to me, i've left the light on and am the best version of relaxed and glad to see him that i know to be right now. i have a feeling that honing and milking that feeling might be my money vein of emotion. but...but but but i don't need a but, emotions that acknowledges and allows desire and celebrates the reason to move forward, the "something that can inspire me to want"......that's my only work and even that is probably too much. the stream is taking me and it's time to great this day and end it hopefully absolutely delighted with myself and all that i carry through it with me. i'm going out to enjoy and see what good things this world has for me to be with and sift for ease and flow within, and pleasure.
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