Becoming a Deliberate creator is all about trial and error if you ask me. The Law of Attraction is a learning experience. My learning experience took a turn for the unknown. 3 months ago I met someone who made me feel like a school girl. A kind of attraction to a man I hadn't felt in years. I abandoned a two year romance with another man and began seeking this one who made me feel fresh and a live. We got very close in the beginning, but the demands of his day to day life started to consume his time, energy and attention. During the duration of two months we have been texting and messaging --- but not actually seeing each other. I did a lot of visualizations, affirmations and believe it or not --- A LOT OF ME TIME! In hopes that he and I would get together again and continue to explore the possibilities of a relationship. However, during these two months I have been attaching myself to the idea of being his girlfriend ever since we did it and took the extra mile to buy him something expensive that he loves in order to get his attention. I ask myself why I did that and so many reasons pop into my head. I'm attached, I'm desperate, I want to give him a taste of what we could have, I want him to like me, I want him to think highly of me --- SO MANY REASONS.
But my impatience and desperation and attachment have left me feeling emotionally drained by everything. Even though I finally got to see him for an hour after two months, I still do not feel fulfilled. I feel lost, I don't know where this relationship is going anymore. I forbid myself from excessive money spending, tarot readings, reaching out to him and any other unhealthy actions I've been taking to advance my relationship with this person. I wouldn't say I hit the bottom, but this is definitely a low point for me. I feel like I didn't use the Law of Attraction to get his attention --- I tried to buy his attention and it worked. BUT THERE'S THIS UNNATURAL FEELING UNDERNEATH IT ALL. I was too afraid to let him go, so I tried to buy my way into his life which is unnecessary!
Can anybody give me some advice or relate to being at a desperate low point for someone's attention?
I know what I have to do now. Let go and meditate.