For the longest time, I was living terribly.

I had no friends, and had terrible self esteem.

After reading the secret, I began feeling the feeling of having all these wonderful friends.

After a few weeks, I was suddenly living exactly how I had always wanted to, hanging out with the people I always wanted to. I had a ton of new friends and was VERY happy.

It felt so perfect, I was scared to go back where I was before. I began remembering how much my life sucked before, and how terrible it was, not having any friends when I needed them.

I developed a huge fear of not having alot of friends anymore, and as a result, that's exactly what happened.

My friends and I got into a fight, a fight we still have never recovered from, forcing me to hang out with my "not so close" friends.

I want to go back to the perfect life I once lived, but for some reason, I just can't remember what it was like, having everything, when all of a sudden I lost it all.

I now have a very small (less than 5) number of friends, and I feel so mad all the time, and so shut off from the world.

I feel like I cannot control my mind and my thoughts, though I had done it once before.

I miss my friends sooooooooo much, and would give my life to have them back.

But how can I do it?

Any suggestions?

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  • Hi There, New gal on the block here with a suggestion.
    First, lets not give our life away so easily as you stated in the last sentence.
    As I agree with much of what the others replied here, one thing that came to my mind when you said "I miss my friends".
    Sounds to me that you really do miss your old friends.
    You need to return to that place of an "Open Heart". In doing this you are forgiving, loving, recieving forgivness, loving, grateful, loving, GIVING, etc. Notice how I repeated loving more and more. Do all with a loving sincere OPEN HEART. This will bring you back to that place you were when you had that loving relationship with your close wonderful friends.
    You can forgive your old friends and they can forgive you.
    Mike was right about raising your vibration that frequency that we talked about above. When you are in an Open Heart the frequency is very High and it moves Very Fast.
    Ut OH...as I realize that Trish said that having more than 5 friends is not necessary....OH gee, (sorry Trish) I disagree. I know she ment well and less than 5 was enought for Trish and the number wasnt important to her. It is clearly important to you. We do for ourselve what is important to us and what makes us Happy.
    Heck I only need or want or disire a car that runs. Others like all the frills,a shiny coat of red paint and an IPOD plug in.
    So where do you start you might ask? How about making room for those new and old friends in your life. Start by decluttering your life. I bet you have a closet to clean out and tons of stuff you can give away to a charity. Thats the giving mentioned. Also a biggy with me is paying attention. Did you know when you pay attention to others, really pay attention...you are GIVING them your attention. When you reach this place of an OPEN HEART as I call it, think and say what it is you truly want as friendships in your life and Source/Universe/GOD will GIVE you his undivided ATTENTION.
    Respectfull of the other replies left, this is mine. Sending you much love and success in your Awareness. Blessings J
  • Mike gave you all the info you need, and I was about to type what 'Aztec' recommended, working on you first. You are placing the value of your happiness on whether or not you have 'friends', or even the amount of friends. I think having 'five' friends is great! I have less than that...I'm talking 'genuine' friends here, and I'm perfectly content with that. I don't have to keep up with as many people, and everyone else I run into or hang out with are all pleasant surprises or additions for that particular outing. And I can go weeks without talking to any of my 'close' friends and it doesn't phase me one bit. I'm perfectly happy by myself. You've basically told yourself 'I can't be happy unless I have lots of friends', and so that's what you're getting...unhappiness. Happiness is not in your friends, your family, or anything outside of you. It's IN you...you learn to detach yourself from everything external and be at peace with the 'internal', and then eventually work back to manifesting your friendships back...or perhaps getting new ones. If you find yourself getting 'stuck' on being content and happy (having high self-esteem) without anyone else, maybe you should try some subliminal stuff. Several of us on here use subliminal CDs, and Mike recommended a free program you download to your PC that flashes subliminal messages while you work.

    Here's the links to some programs worth looking at:

    www.SubliminalBlaster.com (free download)
  • I reccomend working on the self esteem part. All the friends in the world could never replace a feeling of genuine self trust and esteem. There's a book that I had its small nd costs 7.99 called How to Raise Your Self Esteem by Nathaniel Branden, this book is awesome, and with the shit I had to put up ith it was a life saver, literally!
  • Hi Kay Lee:

    Here is my suggestion: work on yourself first. Right now your subconscious is loaded with doubt in your ability to have friends and keep them. In order to free yourself from your past you need to dedicate yourself to changing yourself on a much deeper level than you have probably ever tried before. The good news is, you can undo the damage (you may not attract back the friends that you lost, but you can bring new ones on that match your new vibrational pattern).

    To start, I'm not sure of your background knowledge on the conscious and subconscious mind so I will mention a few things. First, "The Secret" is a good introduction but it is far from a complete resource and it barely touches the subject that I just mentioned. Your subconscious mind contains all of the "programming" that has become innate within you and this includes both good and bad habits. Changing at the subconscious level is where one is able to trigger the Law of Attraction for an incredible and permanent change. This is a process called neural reconditioning, which is just a fancy way of saying changing your thinking (biologically, changing your thinking creates new neural pathways in your brain).

    This is where people trip up with LOA. They make declarations with their conscious mind but because their feelings are not matching these thoughts, they are not seeing the results that they need. Repetition is key in neural reconditioning which is why many LOA sources out there really highlight it. There are various ways to do this but one of the oldest and most effective methods is affirmations. Affirmations are statements made in the present tense and the first person indicating that you have what you want already (an example would be "I make new friends easily and often"). You've probably heard things like "If you tell that to yourself enough times, you'll believe it to be true." Well that's what you're going for. You convince yourself through repetition that it's true and by the Law of Attraction, it becomes true.

    Another thing to do is to let go of the past. Whatever happened has happened, do not fret over that which you cannot control. Those are all negative emotions that will get in your way. Forgive yourself for past mistakes and let go as holding onto the past only damages you. A rule I made for myself a while ago is that each day I would think of something from my past and I would let go of it. Sometimes I would even find an item that reminded me of the past that had haunted me for so long and to fulfill my little "ritual" I would get rid of it (in the case of paper stuff, I burned it in my fireplace and imagined that the fire was releasing the tension and negative energy of the past, sending it up the chimney and out of my house and my life).

    Keep in mind that the outer world is the effect, not the cause, it is a projection of what's inside. In the end, it really is as simple as changing the inside as that automatically changes the outside (and you will know when the change has happened, trust me).

    Once you have changed your internal views on yourself and your life, your outside world will reflect that and you will find it easy to affirm and attract friends and admirers (take it from someone who was not even close to popular in high school and became one of the most popular people on campus in college within a couple of months). You can do a whole lot more with it. As you do more and more, you realize that you can control pretty much every aspect of your life. The limitation is that LOA abides by the other laws in the universe (like the law of gravity) and you cannot use LOA to control another person.

    You have it within you to change your entire life and rebuild it to what you want it to be. Let me know if you want or need further guidance.

  • I agree, you have to change your thoughts. Find a hobbie, focus your attention on something positive. When you start feeling bad or sad you attract back those feelings. I notice when I have free time, I tend to focus on negative feelings. When that happens I try to find something that will distract my attention or switch my thoughts to positive ones, talking a walk, painting, listening to music, playing video games, etc. :-D
  • Hi! Oh, I completely understand where you are coming from and I realize these feelings can be daunting. What are the other things you do with your time? Do you have a profession or school that you enjoy or hobbies to keep you involved with other things?

    I look forward to hearing back from you soon and as Abraham would say, "you are loved" :-)

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