Love comes and goes - please help

I first read The Secret about 5 years ago. I was in a very unhappy marriage, I hated my job and nothing seemed to go right until I started to use the LOA and the guidelines in The Secret. Things started to happen and I felt so much happier. I got out of the marriage with less grief than I anticipated, my work led me to bigger and better things, I moved by the sea (a childhood dream) and I fell in love again. I thanked God everyday and put out gratitude to the Universe. But.... Things started to go wrong,,, my partner was not the man he said he was and after a year of unhappiness, left crying and he stole from me lots of times...I knew I had to get out. . We split up and although this is what I wanted, I felt so low and alone. I read The Secret again and started to feel more confident and happy.  I moved into to my dream flat with sea view and got promoted and things started to happen again. I felt happy inside until my ex started to text me saying he was an idiot and didn't realise what he had and didn't appreciate me the way he should have. We went out a couple of times and had an amazing time. He showed me the person I fell in love with and I felt that we could make things work. He texted me just before Christmas and said he wanted to treat me to a weekend away to Dublin as he never bothered with treats for me before. I was so excited. On the day we were suppose to go, he didn't answer his phone and I was left crying on my own again. I couldn't believe it. 

We have spoken since mainly about the money he owes me - I looked after him for almost a year as he couldn't find a job and I paid for everything. He took me for granted and it wasn't until I found out he wasn't looking for a job, I started an IOU list. 

Anyway, he has now posted pictures on FB with a new girlfriend. This has broken me. I can't believe he is still hurting me. Why can I not stop thinking about him when I wanted to leave him so long ago?

I don't ask for much, just a man that is caring, funny and loving. I see all my friends with loving marriages and beautiful children and just wish it is my turn soon. 

Sorry this has gone on a bit now. Can anyone give me any advice to stop thinking about him and how I can manifest my dream man?

God bless you all. Kx 

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  • I would really write down the REAL QUALITIES you NEED baseline in a partner....and focus on them....over and over and over, and begin to trust the little faeries of the universe can deliver that!

  • Thank you Dream,

    It makes total sense in what you are saying. I am actually very happy on my own but am so scared of seeing him in the street with another girl. It's like he's won a game. But like you say - I had bad memories so I should just let go.....

    Thank you for your kind words, you have helped a lot.

    God bless


    • I am damn will get a guy who loves you genuinely and will never hurt you ever....just ignore that jerk.....

      remember...if you be sad....and vulnerable...he will try taking advantage again.....people like him....will get paid eventually for all the negative karma....

    • Thanks you are so right - AND I like the 'Jerk' bit - made me smile x

      Thank you x

  • Thank you Gunn,

    Your words mean a lot. I am feeling much more positive and would like to add you in my gratitude list of today. You helped me understand. 

    And your English is VERY good. :-)

    God bless


  • Hi ...even i have been through failed relationships and was cheated in the past....all i would say is no matter how much you feel trusting that guy again....just recollect all the bad memories he gave and dont trust his sweet talks deserve the best.....and try spending time with your friends and family members.....share this with some one elderly person...your mother or grandmom or sister....they will surely help you coming out of this....and guide you with the next guy who enters your life.....

    remember that when you start loving yourself, the world would love you....start thinking that you are the best and deserve the best job and the best guy....

    and please dont think that life would be miserable if you dont get a guy...its nothing like that...may be god has some better plans....enjoy your single life with dear of now....and keep making new friends.....

    let that Mr. right come in search of you....rather than you chasing some one.....

    have faith!!!!!!!! take care.....

  • Hi!

    I have noticed i go through losses much faster if i go to a therapist. If you cant say to yourself "get over it" and then you are over it... it might means that you need more time. It is very important to talk to someone who is able to listen and dont give so much advice. Hurt emotions dont need advice, it needs healing and time, care and  of course forgive yourself for letting that smock in to your life....

    When you are stronger write a list to remember of all of his bad the worst with big letters - ask yourself is this what i want in my life?... watch the dvd secret one more time.. write good things on a post it and put it behing your mobile, look at this many times a day. write your LOA list and put it in your pocket, purse, jacket etc. - look at the list many times a day... i always go through a gratituelist in my mind before i vizualise i have those things....just a tip!! exuse my english... im from norway and normally dont write in english...

  • Thank you so much empowered1 for those true, meaningful words. Your right - I forget to think of how I would feel. I would be so happy, feel so motivated and at ease.

    Thank you again - you have helped me already.

    God bless you x

  • How about the abe practice of "What would it feel like if I had this thing that I am wanting?  How would I feel?"

    I would feel happy and I would feel at ease.

    I would feel eager and I would feel at peace...

    Or how ever you think you would feel if you had that person in your life.  Not this specific one but the one who would treat you the way you want to be treated.

    Also think about loving yourself for a while.  Takes the pressure and the burden off of another to meet our expectations. 

    And that's when relationships can flow easily.

    If you get into the feeling place of having everything you want, loa and the universe bring it to you.  It is law:)

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