Hi. :) I have read most of the threads here but I'm posting in hope that I can get a more specific guidance/ answer.

There have been some problems in my relationship. I've been hurt to an extreme extent and that hurt feeling caused me to say things I didn't mean. Worse still, he kept provoking me to a beyond hurt stage, way beyond breaking point. You know how when you're hurt you just do not even know what you're talking about until that moment has passed. After some time, that extreme hurt feeling started to fade away, and as it fades I start to feel guilty for certain things I said. 

Well, I never said or indirectly tell that I hate him because I DON'T. But he is that kind of person who always puts words in others' mouths, always blame others SOLELY 100% in any situation, and always thinks that people hate him. Yes I've tolerated him for years. He thinks I hate him too, and that thought is stronger after the latest incident/ problem. 

How do you deal with guilt? Although principle wise he has done too many unforgiveable things (but i still will forgive), I still blame myself for many many things. It's like there's something in me that keeps trying to find fault in myself. I regret a lot of things and I feel quite depressed :( Any help? Thanks.

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  • http://www.powerfulintentions.org/group/lawofattraction/forum/topic...

    I'm gonna read the crap out if this ha ha!
  • Nice answers!
    I'd also like to add, I know what it's like to blame yourself re a relationship.
    Well, how about the
    Abraham Hicks process "Book of Positive Aspects"
    How about doing it on yourself, writing a list a day on what you do RIGHT & what you did right in the relationship.
    And what you like about you.
    I've been through the guilt thing & it sucks & this is a good way to shift it.
    Plus I think Pilar (PDM) & Chris Dee both gave you great advice AND
    as someone here said to me recently,
    Pivot time: (also an Abraham Hicks process)
    "I don't want feel guilty I do want to feel proud of myself"
    "I don't want to feel hurt I do want to feel healed"
  • Hi, Lindy -   I am in total agreement with Pilar. Focus only on S-E-L-F. The other person (no matter how important they may seem at the moment) is basically of NO consequence. YOUR vibration is the ONLY thing that you can affect and the ONLY thing that matters. If you are in alignment with self then happiness (whether with this person or someone else or maybe all alone!) MUST follow. The answer is NOT focused in the details, I wouldn't look for a specific answer. The answer is to learn how to soothe and eventually love yourself.  (My eBook - look to the right of your screen, can really be of help in your journey to mate with your own soul first)... Best of luck in your journey towards the Vortex!  ~Chris

  • Hi Lindy,

    I recommend the following Abe quotes, whichever thread you find gives you the most clarity:

    Relationships
    Relationships, Attracting & Choosing
    Relationships, Ending

    Relationships, Looking at Failed

    Relationships, Troubleshooting

    And also, Abe's book, The Vortex, which is about relationships.

    But basically, the solution is loving yourself unconditionally, and then all else follows.

    All the best to you,

    :)

  • I still love him a lot, that's why I blame myself for many things. And I feel sorry for hurting him although he's been hurting me so much (I just swallow it all because I love him) 

    And I'm still angry (less of hurt) with how he has hurt me.

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